The Measure of a Man
by Luke-Angels
Summary: What is the measure of a man or woman? Only the '101 Sexiest Citizens of the New Republic' knows for sure…
1. Chapter 1

**The Measure of a Man**

_by: Luke-Angels_

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From her spot, sandwiched comfortably between her husband and the back wall of the elevator, Mara Jade Skywalker had the vague sense that she was forgetting something.

--Luke?-- she sent through their Force bond to her husband, as her lips were otherwise occupied.

--Hmmm?-- he lightly ran his hands down her ribcage, tickling and causing shivers to run over her body.

--Shouldn't we be somewhere?-- It was hard to think with Luke's hands everywhere, seemingly at once.

He didn't answer and Mara didn't really mind, and she let her own hands start to wander over his body. She'd just gotten back that morning from a two-month sojourn with Mirax, and had fervently leapt onto her husband at the landing platform, not giving a damn who happened to be watching. The past few hours had been a blur of welcoming home embraces, and now they were in an elevator going…

--Your sister's!-- Mara spoke up again over the bond, remembering. --Our first anniversary party.--

--Oh, okay,-- but Luke seemed uninterested as he began kissing down her neck and shoulder, bared by the halter-dress she wore.

--_Luke,_-- she moaned over the bond, before realizing the elevator had stopped, presumably at Han and Leia's floor. --Luke!--

Disgruntled, he pulled back from his exploration of her collar bone. "What?" he asked aloud.

"Our party. Your sister's. Let's go," Mara demanded as she looked towards the elevator doors as they opened.

"What if I don't want to?" Luke asked, grinning naughtily at her. He began kissing her neck again, slowly.

Mara moved her hair to give him better access, but still prodded at him, even as the doors closed and they began moving down again. "Your sister has gone to a lot of trouble to plan this party… I think we should at least…" she trailed off, as he reached her ear and nibbled. Suddenly she wondered why they needed anyone else to help them commemorate their anniversary. Surely the celebrations would be far more enjoyable with just the two of them.

"Admit it, you don't really want to go to the party either…" Luke whispered into her ear, setting her whole body aflame.

Mara looked at him impishly. --What party?-- she sent, already kissing him again.

------

The door chime rang and Leia ran ahead of Threepio to open it, sensing her brother's presence on the other side. Han reached it first, however, and opened it wide to find a grinning Wedge and Iella Antilles, a blushing Luke Skywalker and a disgruntled Mara Jade Skywalker.

Wedge walked in without prompting and said, "We found them in a clinch in your elevator."

"It's a good thing we left the girls at home with a sitter….they would have witnessed a bit too much in that elevator…" Iella said through laughter, and Luke blushed harder. Mara pushed past them all, leaving her husband to deal with the embarrassment all on his own.

Han leaned in towards his wife. "Remind me to take the stairs from now on."

Leia laughed but hugged her red-faced brother anyway, whispering congratulations to him. Han slapped him on the back and winked, before zeroing in and stalking after Mara who had moved over into a corner and was speaking with Corran and Mirax Horn and Tendra Calrissian.

"So, interesting elevator ride, Mara?" Han asked his sister-in-law genially.

Mara glared at him. "Stow it, Solo."

Mirax smiled knowingly. "You should have seen her, all the way back to Coruscant, all starry-eyed…"

Mara growled and the others laughed. "Okay, okay. You've had your fun…"

"Seems like you have too," Corran interrupted, grinning.

The small group laughed again, and even harder as Leia practically dragged her brother over to join them. Mara took Luke's hand and glared around, daring anyone to comment, and wisely they all kept quiet. Lando Calrissian came over and joined up with the group, planting an arm around his wife's waist. "Congratulations you two," he said to Luke and Mara. "One year married. Who ever would have thought? The lovely Ms. Jade and the Jedi Skywalker… Marital bliss…" he smiled crookedly at them, raising his drink in a shaky, solitary toast.

"How much have you had to drink, Lando?" Mara asked, eyeing the half-empty glass of whiskey he held in his hand.

"What?" he asked. "This? This is something Karrde brought in for you and Luke…" Lando gestured with his head, towards the kitchen. "He, Shada, and Chewie are in there--"

"Karrde and Shada are here?" Luke asked, turning to Leia. "Who else did you invite?"

"A few others, I'm sure they're on their way," she responded. "And the kids, of course. They're here, off in one of their rooms…hopefully not getting in to too much trouble."

Han rolled his eyes, having too much experience with his own children, much less the children of his friends, to have any hope for that being true.

"I'll go check on them," he volunteered, and Luke followed, dodging as Wedge began to tell Lando what he'd seen in the elevator, and Lando reached out to slap him in the back.

"Thanks for the party, Han," he said as they approached the bedrooms.

"No problem, Kid," he answered, listening at Jaina's door and shaking his head. "Not in there…"

The next door was Anakin's and Han swung it open to find the kids all piled on Anakin's bed, staring at the wall. Jaina and Jacen were sitting back to back near the headboard, and Anakin and Valin Horn lay at the bottom of the bed, half-heartedly tossing a small ball to one another. The kids noticed the adults, and perked up.

"We're bored…" Jaina Solo said, drawing out the word 'bored' until it was almost unrecognizable.

Han looked over at his brother-in-law and smirked. "Sounds like you, Kid."

Luke looked affronted. "Well, why don't you all play a game?" he suggested. "I know you have plenty of them. Or perhaps Threepio--"

"We've already played with Threepio! He's boring, anyway!" Valin piped up, and the Solo children nodded in agreement.

Luke sighed, suddenly glad that Mara had told him she'd like to wait a few years before attempting to have children. "Well…. why don't you watch the HoloNet?"

"Really?" Jaina's eyes lit up.

Han groaned. "Uh, Kid," he started, but the children were running past him and down the hall, towards the family room where the Holonet was kept. Han looked at Luke. "Leia doesn't like the kids to watch the HoloNet, says there's nothing but tawdry programming on there."

Luke raised an eyebrow. "Tawdry?"

"Her word, not mine."

Luke nodded and the two men headed down the hall to look in on the kids, but were waylaid by the arrival of more guests, Winter and Tycho Celchu, followed by a few of the Rogues, who all immediately made for the whiskey. Luke lost track of the number of times he was slapped on the back in congratulations (probably more so for the elevator ride than the anniversary, he thought), and he was seriously beginning to fear he was going to bruise. Mara was over in a corner with all the party's females and they laughed over something... and as Mara looked over at him and winked, he feared they were laughing at him.

Luke made his way towards the women of the party anyway, hoping that they at least wouldn't smack him on the back. Just as he reached their small group, Mirax spoke up to Leia, asking if she could put Valin down to sleep in the guest room, as it was probably past his bedtime. It was then that Luke remembered the HoloNet, and he looked towards his brother-in-law with a panicked expression.

Both men took off in front of the women towards the family room. They got there just in time to see all four children watching a scantily clad purple Twi'lek fawn all over one of the more famous holo-actors of the moment.

Mirax and Leia came into the room just then, with Leia asking Han sharply, "Just what are the children watching?"

Han turned to Luke. "Kid?"

"Uh..."

Just then, the images of the holo-actor were replaced with an image of Corran Horn who had the number 74 outlined over his body. Valin pointed at the screen and said, "Daddy!"

Mirax looked at the HoloNet. "What in the stars...?"

The purple Twi'lek was speaking while holos of Corran flashed. Mirax called for him to come in and see what was playing on the HoloNet, and practically the whole party came into the family room, eager to see what all the fuss was about.

"...he may be short, but you know what they say about short men..." the Twi'lek simpered, moving sensually around on her stage, in front of a large holo of Corran, running and bare-chested.

Corran, entering the room, was speechless. His Rogue Squadron mates, however, were not.

"What in the... Horn! All right, buddy!" Wes slapped Corran on the back as a holo of him and his ex-girldfriend Siolle Tinta showed on the screen.

"What is this?!" Corran finally asked, avoiding the sparks his wife was shooting at him from her eyes over the holo of him and his old flame.

"_101 Sexiest Citizens of the New Republic_," Jaina spoke up. "They have these shows on all the time."

"What?" Leia said, looking at her daughter. "How often have you watched shows like these?"

"Oh, tons," Jaina said, sounding bored. "Uncle Luke is on them all the time."

Everyone turned and looked at Luke. "Don't look at me," he said, "I've never heard of this before now, either."

Han looked at his daughter. "What about Daddy, sweetheart? Is he on these shows?"

"Han!" Leia elbowed him.

"Yeah, Dad! You're on some. There was one... _101 Sexiest Pilots_."

Han grinned. "And was I on that one?"

"Yeah, but you were only number 25."

"25!" Han looked scandalized.

"Well, Dad, they said "_You're only as sexy as the ship you pilot_..." " Jaina's voice was lost in the roar of laughter that followed her comment.

Several more holos of Corran flashed on the screen, with the purple Twi'lek keeping up a running monologue of Corran's attributes. Mirax and Corran watched open mouthed as several holos appeared on the screen of them together, apparently in private settings, and Valin shouted when a holo appeared of him and his father at one of Coruscant's indoor swimming pools.

The Twi'lek appeared once more, as the holos of Corran faded away. "That's one pilot who could _run my course_ any day…" she said, preening. Mirax's eyes widened and she picked up her son, storming from the room. Corran looked torn between going after her, or staying to watch and see if he was featured on the show any longer.

The Twi'lek was speaking, again. "…remember _you_ voted NR, and these are your Top 101 choices for the sexiest citizens in the New Republic! I'm Nabrina'vida, your hostess, and when we come back from the advertisements we'll have more of your choices and I'll add a bit more sexiness to your night!" She thrust her chest out and smiled seductively at the holocorder.

Jaina snickered. "Jacen thinks _Nabrina'vida_ is sexy…"

Leia looked at her glazed-eyed son. "Okay, then! Time for you three to go to bed. Han?" she looked towards her husband for help. The wrangled up the protesting children and left the rest of the party in front of the HoloNet.

Luke leaned in to turn it off, tired of the loud advertisements that now blared from the screen. He was stopped by a chorus of "No!"

"What?" he asked, looking up at his wife and friends.

"Uh, well…" Lando said, sipping his drink nervously.

Everyone looked very shifty, and Luke could feel their embarrassment through the Force.

"You all want to see if you're on the list, don't you?" he asked, astonished. He was amazed by the answering nods, and blushes.

Mara came over and took his hand, settling him down beside herself on the sofa facing the Holonet. "Come on, Farmboy, it can't be _that_ bad…" she winked at him. "I'll bet _you're_ on the list…" She smiled at his blush and turned to talk with Iella, and suddenly the din of conversation was very loud as the party-goers began to speculate, and bet. Karrde immediately took change and began dictating names and numbers of credits to Shada, who took them down with an eager smile on her lips.

Luke tamped down his blush and looked around groaning. "I have a bad feeling about this…" he said, but it was lost in the excitement that began as Nabrina'vida once again took to the screen.

-----


	2. Chapter 2

_Chapter 2_

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Luke couldn't believe he was spending his anniversary party, which he had been assured would be kept low-key, watching a scantily-clad Twi'lek rank galactic sexiness with his closest friends. Not to mention that those friends were actually getting rather invested in whether they would place on the list and if so, how highly. Luke would much rather have spent the evening finishing what he had begun with Mara in the elevator if he knew the celebrations were going to be sidetracked in this way.

"Relax, Skywalker," Mara nudged him gently, picking up on his unspoken thoughts. "There's plenty of time for fun later. Aren't you even curious as to whether you're on the list?"

"Forget you, Boss," Wes slapped him on the back as he perched himself on the arm of the couch. "I'm only interested in Miss Nabrina'vida." He wriggled his eyebrows suggestively.

"It _would_ be a crime if she doesn't make the list," a male voice sounded from the throng behind the couch.

"Han!" Leia glared at her husband warningly.

"Don't look at me," Han raised his hands in surrender. "It was Lando!"

The former Baron gulped under an equally unpleasant glare from his own wife. "It was Antilles!" he defended himself.

Pre-empting a similar deathly look from Iella, Wedge quickly fingered Hobbie as the culprit, who in turn, labelled Wes as the guilty party. Wes seemed overburdened by the harsh scrutiny of every woman in the room and quickly yelled, "It was Luke!"

The room dissolved into laughter, all except Luke, who blushed furiously. Mara pressed her cool lips to his enflamed cheek and patted his hand comfortingly. "I know you would never say anything like that Farmboy," she said softly.

Han snorted into his bottle of ale. "Or live to say anything after it," he mumbled, causing Shada and Karrde, who were standing next to him, to snicker quietly and throwing Leia into confusion over whether to laugh or give her husband an appropriate swipe. In the end, she found a compromise, a broad grin stretching over her face even as she slapped Han upside the head.

But most of the men's eyes were still locked on Nabrina'vida as she fawned over number seventy, one of the seven princes of Carthia, while expertly showing her ample cleavage to the audience. Luke, for his part, averted his eyes, determined to be a gentleman even if it was a solitary ambition.

"Don't act so modest, Luke," Wedge chided him from the armchair. "I seem to remember you having a 'thing' for Twi'leks," he added devilishly as he pulled Iella onto his lap.

"That's right," Wes added, thumping Luke on the back once again. Luke made the silent decision to wear a durasteel vest the next time he attended one of these parties. "I remember you even had a holo of one in your quarters on Hoth."

"She was a fine specimen, all right," Wedge rejoined, earning a raised eyebrow from his wife.

"Lovely yellow hue, not to mention certain other attributes," Han nodded, grinning. "You had excellent taste back then, Kid. And uh…still do," he added quickly. The gathering all turned towards Mara, seemingly waiting for her to erupt. Luke smiled knowingly and took her hand in his.

"Thanks for the information, boys," she began, giving them a rare smile. "But I already knew about that particular predilection."

"The wonders of a Force bond," added Luke, pleased that they had not been able to embarrass him again. And besides, what male human didn't like Twi'leks? Certainly none he had ever met.

"Oh, really?" Wedge grinned devilishly. "Well, did he tell you about - "

"Quiet!" came a sharp voice from behind the couch, which Luke quickly identified as Karrde's. He turned his head and gave the man a questioning look, but the smuggler chief's eyes were glued to the holoscreen.

"That's right, New Republic," Nabrina'vida seemed slightly less excited about announcing the recipient of the sixty-seventh spot, but nevertheless was still energetic. "Whether it be in disguise, or jaunting the galaxy with her employer and sources say," the Twi'lek winked, "her secret love, Shada Dukal does it with style." An image of Shada dressed as one of the Tonnika sisters appeared, followed by a series of holos of her as a Mistyal guard and more recent images of her with Karrde.

"Don't they look cosy together?" Nabrina'vida simpered, causing the room to erupt into whistles and suggestive chatter. Luke looked questionably at Mara, but she was eyeing her former employer and his new second in command with a blank expression. If anything had happened between the pair, Mara wasn't privy to it. For his part, Luke was just relieved he was no longer the recipient of over-zealous back-slapping.

"Have you been holding out on us, Karrde?" Lando inquired, stroking his moustache with barely-concealed glee. "I knew you couldn't hold up the ranks of bachelorhood for long. Not when the alternative is so much more pleasing." He patted Tendra squarely on the behind, causing the Saccorian to slap him back playfully but give him an appreciative smile.

"Didn't I tell you?" Han was gloating to Leia. "I knew my whole speech about strong women would get to you, Karrde."

"Don't look so pleased, Solo," Shada cut in, although it was obvious she was delighted at having made the list. "Or you might just get silenced by one or all of those_ strong women_."

"Our relationship is still strictly business," Karrde added seriously.

"Is that what you call it now?" Mirax called from across the room, where Corran was still puffed up with pride.

"Besides," rejoined Iella, putting an arm round her husband's shoulders. "You don't want to end up like these two," she said, indicating Wes and Hobbie.

"Because there is a difference between fruitful bachelorhood and just not being able to get a date," Mirax teased, fluffing Corran's hair.

The laugher and jesting only died down when Iella was announced as number sixty-four on the list. "Don't be fooled," said Nabrina'vida, "This gorgeous blonde and former CorSec agent is anything but demure. If the standard Corellian security forces training is anything to go by, chances are Mrs. Antilles is a disciplinarian in the bedroom. I'm sure I'm not the only one who would love to know the details in the 'negotiations' between her and the General."

The cat-calls began immediately, as Iella covered her face in her hands and buried it in her husband's shoulder. "I hope the girls aren't watching this at home," she moaned.

"So, Iella, care to share any techniques with us?" Corran teased.

"Need help in that department, do you CorSec?" Mara seemed to have recovered from her earlier detachment and was more than willing to give their friends a hard time over the show.

Corran fell silent, but there was no mistaking the small shake of Mirax's head and the sly wink she gave back to Mara.

"Techniques?" Wedge patted Iella on her thighs that were thrown over his lap. "Divide and conquer."

The room once again exploded into laughter, and this time Luke at least gave the pretence of joining in. It had been a while since he had been in the company of so many of his friends, at least a year, when he and Mara had married. And this occasion was proving to be much less formal, although Luke couldn't deny his mortification at the whole situation. Mara often called him a prude, but it wasn't as if Luke had never been involved in such conversations. One of the Rogue's, himself included, favourite pastimes during the Rebellion was to rank the appeal of the female personnel, and try and gauge their own. But it had never been in the presence of ladies and Luke, although he knew the hypocrisy of the thought, couldn't quite shake off his uneasiness.

So he turned his attention back to the screen as the images of Iella faded away. "Can you guess who will be next?" Nabrina'vida grinned. "I'll give you a hint…blond hair, blue eyes, body to die for, and a stellar pilot. Who will it be? We'll find out after these messages."

Chatter once again filled the room as many of the women gave Luke meaningful looks. Mara nudged him excitedly, both with her hand against his side, and with the Force. Luke dismissed it. That hardly described him! Instead, he took stock of the room, and noticed Karrde and Shada disappear into the kitchen. He decided not to alert Mara to the fact. Luke knew she was still rather protective of her friend and hadn't quite adjusted to the fact that Shada had all but taken her place in Karrde's organisation.

Dismissing that thought as quickly as it had come, Luke turned towards Iella to politely praise her on making the list, but found that Wedge was already congratulating her in his own way. He swiftly averted his eyes from the lip-locked couple and locked them back to the holoscreen, hoping he would be able to commend Mara in a similar way at the end of the evening.

-----

Unbeknownst to the rest of the party, there was another couple celebrating the good fortune of making a place on the list. Sequestered in the kitchen, a certain Smuggler Chief was taking liberties in lauding his second-in-command, but there was very little chance the woman intended on calling him on sexual harassment. In fact, he would probably be to his detriment to actually halt the proceedings.

"We should be careful," Karrde murmured against Shada's lips, loathe to break contact with her. "They're on to us."

"They," replied Shada, multitasking the dexterity of her tongue, "are harmless. And most of them are drunk."

"I saw Skywalker watching us, though," Karrde pulled back slightly, but tightened his hold on Shada's waist. "He'll figure it out."

"Like you figured him and Mara out?" Shada stroked his cheek softly. "I think you can trust him to return the favour and keep his silence."

"I suppose so," Karrde conceded.

"Or we could just tell them." Shada shrugged. It wasn't a hint to him, or a suggestion. Her opinions on the matter were ambivalent. She didn't care if the whole galaxy knew or if it was kept between the two of them for the rest of their lives. But Talon…

"No," he answered softly, preferring to keep his private life exactly that. "And besides," he added wistfully, "I'm an information broker. I never give out information freely."

Shada laughed lowly and pulled him closer. "Then I suppose we better return, in order not to arouse suspicions," she said, although she clearly had no intention of letting go of her partner.

"That would be the logical choice," Karrde answered, nodding. "One I will consider in due time," he said as he pulled her into a fierce kiss.

-----

"We're back with the _101 Sexiest Citizens of the New Republic_," Nabrina'vida put her hands on her hips and thrust out her chest. "And at number fifty-nine is none other than that Rogue Squadron veteran…Tycho Celchu!" She looked saucily at the audience. "Were you expecting someone else?" she added, laughing merrily as her lekku twitched. "Well, you could be forgiven for mistaking this handsome Alderaanian for another striking former Rebel. In fact, there was a rather intriguing rumour a few years ago that proposed Tycho Celchu was merely an alter ego for none other than Luke Skywalker himself!"

Han erupted into rancorous laughter. "I remember that!" he managed to say in between roars. "That's all any holoreporters would ask me about you, Kid."

"Yes, it certainly was hilarious," Luke muttered, remembering the grief and annoyance it had caused him.

"The conspiracy theorists still claim some sort of truth to the rumour, and it's not without merit," Nabrina'vida continued slyly. "Our researchers were not able to uncover any holos of these two similarly sexy men together in the same frame. But with their pleasingly physical similarities, Tycho makes the list, and we'll let you be the judge." A series of holos of Tycho flittered across the screen, while the large number fifty-nine flashed over and over again.

Luke looked around to Tycho and Winter, who had been rather quiet that evening and remained so, serenely sitting together against the fall wall. Tycho accepted the gentle ribbing from Han and the Rogues with an indulgent smile. Winter seemed slightly amused, but then again, Luke conceded, it was always hard to tell whether Winter was feeling much of anything so there was a possibility she was absolutely livid at the Twi'lek's insinuations.

"We don't look that alike," Luke said quietly to Mara, who gave him a sceptical glance in response. "What?" he asked.

Wes, who had procured an ale from somewhere, advanced on them and nudged Luke aside, and squeezed onto the couch between him and Mara. "You see, Luke, you gotta have objectivity," he pointed the lip of his ale bottle towards his chest. "Now, I have the wisdom and insight that comes from clarity of intellect."

"Is that right?" Luke asked dryly.

Wes nodded enthusiastically. "You see, someone like Mara, here," he patted her leg which earned him a death glare from the woman in question. "Red hair, green eyes…there's a million of humans across the galaxy with the same genetic makeup. Wedge, Han and myself?" he continued. "Smouldering dark eyes, devilishly good hair? Again, more than accounted for. But you got that blonde and blue thing happening all the way to Tatooine. It's not exactly common among human males and so naturally people are going to clump you and Celchu together."

"You know what Wes?" Mara looked thoughtful. "I don't think I've ever heard anything that's made less sense in my entire life."

"You just can't accept the fact that I've out-thought you, Jade," he snapped back. "If you…"

Luke turned away, resolved not to get into an argument. Mara seemed to thrive on it, but he would rather the evening remain as peaceful as possible, something that did not seem too likely. In any case, he sought someone else to engage in conversation.

However, Wedge and Iella were still occupied in celebrations and it seemed Corran and Mirax had taken note of the fact, and retreated to their own corner of the room to commemorate for themselves. Hobbie jumped onto the couch on Mara's other side, eager to get involved in the discussion of genetics, while Tycho and Winter were engaged in a dignified-looking but obviously private conversation. Lando and Han, both more than slightly inebriated, were bickering over which of them would place higher on the list, a discussion that was quickly becoming more heated and intense. Leia and Tendra were making conciliatory gestures at peace, but it was clear they were both as invested as to the result of the argument of their husbands and just who would be proved right. Karrde and Shada were still suspiciously absent.

Luke could only turn back to the holoscreen, where Nabrina'vida seemed to be doing some kind of seductive dance as footage and music played of one of the young rockstars he knew Jaina adored. In any case, there was more than her jewellery jiggling.

Rubbing his forehead in frustration, Luke sighed, the only thought that seemed to cross his mind was just how much he needed a stiff drink.

-----

_Thank you all for the kind reviews :)_


	3. Chapter 3

_Chapter 3 _

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_  
_  
"Here, buddy," Lando said, slapping Luke's back with one hand while handing him an ale with the other. "Look like you could use a good drink."

Luke winced at the backslap, but looked up and smiled gratefully at Lando, before taking a long pull from the bottle. "Thanks."

"Don't mention it," Lando flashed a grin, looking to the end of the settee where Mara was now arguing the genetic probability of purple Ewoks with Hobbie and Wes. He moved a bit closer to Luke, as if to impart a secret. "Hear you and the wife were spending a bit of quality time in the elevator earlier." 

Luke just managed to hold in a blush. "Uh… well…" 

Lando wiggled his eyebrows playfully.

"It _is_ our first anniversary," Luke said in exasperation, feeling his cheeks warm in spite of himself, at the thought of what exactly he and Mara had been doing in that elevator.

"Indeed," Lando said, "and though I've wished you congratulations, I haven't really gotten to speak to you yet tonight. You know, I owe you a lot, what with helping me to find a wife… and not slicing into me with your lightsaber when you thought I was dating Mara…"

"I wouldn't have--" Luke began to protest.

Lando looked skeptical, but smiled. "It's okay, believe me, with a woman like Mara…" he gave a quiet whistle of appreciation. "Anyway, I wanted to tell you---if you ever want to take your wife someplace a bit more romantic than an elevator, I might just have the spot for you."

"Yeah?" Luke asked.

"You have NOT witnessed a pink and purple Ewok, Janson!" Mara stated quite emphatically, from the end of the settee.

Luke shook his head at Mara's debating Wes on the Ewok color spectrum, noticing that Corran and Mirax had apparently joined in. "I'll admit… I wouldn't mind a … getaway… at times. Just me and her," Luke finished his thought.

Lando smiled. "Well, years ago, I purchased a piece of property that I think you could use. Have you ever heard of the Old Republic 'pleasure crafts'? Those islands in the Western Sea?"

Luke nodded.

"I bought one when they were practically giving them away," Lando stroked his mustache. "It was quite a steal. Anyway, I just wanted to let you know that you and Mara are welcome to use it anytime… But let's keep it a bit quiet, if you will. Tendra and I often make our own 'getaways' there, and I'd hate to find it… overpopulated…" Lando grinned, meaningfully, slapping Luke on the back again.

"I gotcha, old buddy," Luke said, laughing, ignoring the pain in his back. How was it that everyone kept hitting the _same_ spot? "Thanks, we may take you up on that someday."

"What are you two whispering about?" Han asked, walking over and insinuating himself into their conversation. "Trying to figure out if you'll beat Luke on the list, too?"

Han rolled his eyes at Luke. "He thinks he's going to beat _me_."

"I will beat you, if the voters have _any_ taste at all…" Tendra, coming to stand next to her husband, shook her head in amusement at Leia over his remark.

"We weren't whispering about anything," Luke said loudly, seeking to keep Han and Lando's egos from overwhelming them yet again. On the HoloNet, Nabrina'vida looked distinctly unhappy to be showcasing citizen number 57, a Dug who had made it big in the holofilm industry.

"I was just giving Luke here a few pointers on romance… On how to pick a better spot than an elevator for a secret tryst…" Lando grinned, quirking an eyebrow.

Luke's cheeks warmed again, and he cursed under his breath, conscious of how every set of eyes in the room had been drawn to him with Lando's comment.

"Thanks, Lando," he muttered.

"Come on, Kid," Han punched Luke's shoulder. "We all know you're not as innocent as you're pretending."

Several members of Rogue Squadron snorted, and Luke rolled his eyes. "You all know I just prefer to keep … certain things … private."

"Yeah, like in a public elevator," Wedge laughed, pointing his bottle at him accusingly. Iella laughed, winking over to Mara.

"Or on my ship…" Han grumbled. Chewie growled in agreement from across the room.

The crowd laughed, and Mirax pushed at Mara's shoulder. "On the _Falcon_?"

Mara shook her head, pinning Luke with her eyes. "That wasn't me."

The room fell silent. Wes placed a conciliatory arm around Mara, shrinking away when she glared venomously at him.

Luke coughed. "That was a … friend," he defended himself.

"A friend?" Han shook his head. "If that's how you treat a _friend_, Kid, what's Mara?"

"A _very_ good friend," Wedge chimed in. "You know, going on what Iella and I witnessed…"

"Oo-h!" Wes laughed. "I caught the boss with a _friend_ once or twice mys… Hey!" Wes stopped mid-sentence, threw out his arms, smacking into Mara and Hobbie on either side of him, and gaped at the holoscreen. "Is that… Is that…"

Nabrina'vida, looking far cheerier and with a bounce back in her bosom, was smiling naughtily at her audience. "…with his sexy laugh, this pilot is sure to know more than one way to bring a smile to any woman's face…" Nabrina giggled as pictures of Wes Janson, number 54, flashed across the screen.

"Janson! Who would vote for you?!" Corran asked, punching him in the shoulder.

Wedge snorted from his chair. "Endor?"

"Oh, HA HA…" Wes snapped, eyes never leaving Nabrina'vida and the images of him that popped up around her.

Nabrina'vida came to a stop next to a near life-size image of Wes in full Squadron gear. "This sexy lieutenant is a hero of the Battle of Hoth, single-handedly bringing down an Imperial Walker!" The Twi'lek looked suitably impressed, pretending to press more than just a kiss to the holoimage in front of her.

Wes' mouth dropped open at that display, and Corran slapped him on the back. "Looks like you have an admirer…"

"Obviously," Wedge muttered from his corner of the room. "Single-handedly," he snorted. Iella kissed his head, but rolled her eyes towards the rest of the room.

The segment ended and faded into a commercial break, yet still Wes sat transfixed, staring at the spot where his image had been cozied up to Nabrina'vida. Hobbie nudged him. "Uh… It's over, now…"

Wes looked glum. "I think Horn's bit was longer."

Corran's cheeks burned bright red in the roar of laughter that followed Wes's statement, and even Janson's cheeks were tinged pink.

"I guess Luke isn't the only one who can blush," Mirax teased her husband, placing her hand to his heated cheek.

"Yeah, Janson," Mara said, digging an elbow into his ribs. "Pink is a great color for you."

Wes merely grinned good-naturedly. He rose from the settee and breezed by Corran and Mirax, heading for another round of ale. "Can't believe I placed higher than you on the list, Horn," he said, grinning.

"Gods, we'll never hear the end of this…" Corran and the rest of Rogue Squadron rolled their eyes.

Mara settled in next to Luke again as the next few citizens on the countdown were announced. Most were holofilm stars, a female Wookiee whom Chewie said was his son's favorite celebrity, a Twi'lek male whom Nabrina'vida semi-graphically claimed more than just a friendly relationship with, and a Bothan male who had just broken in to the music industry.

Just before citizen number 50 was announced, Karrde and Shada reappeared. At Mara's raised eyebrow Karrde stated that they had been counting up credits and figuring odds to the numbers they had taken before. A few quiet snorts didn't bring even a twitch to either of their faces, and the teasing was stopped before it began.

On the holoscreen Nabrina'vida, having changed into an even skimpier outfit than she had had on before, grinned widely at her audience. "We've gone through 51 of our glorious Republic's sexy citizens. Now, here we are at the turning point—citizen number 50: A citizen sexy enough to bridge the gap, into even sexier territory than we've already ventured. We've already taken a look at her sexy fighter-pilot husband, and this woman certainly has the beauty and sex-appeal to match---Mirax Terrik Horn!"

Mirax squealed from the chair she and Corran had slipped into and pulled away as he pulled her down for a celebratory kiss. "I want to see…" she said, eyes riveted to the HoloNet.

"Awww, look at little Myra…" Wedge teased, grinning at his friend, as several holos of Mirax dressed rather provocatively flashed on the screen. Mirax glared at him playfully. 

"With her long black hair and exotic looks, Mirax is certainly a beauty by anyone's standards. Though her eye-color is a mystery--" Nabrina'vida flashed up a few holos where Mirax's eyes appeared dark, and a few where they appeared a bright shade of blue, "the volume of votes this ex-smuggler received shows that many think she looks stunning either way."

Hoots of laughter escaped around the room, as Mirax rolled her brown eyes. "You use eye-changing contacts a _few_ times…"

"Recently Mirax and another of the galaxy's most famous—or should I say, _infamous_," Nabrina'vida grinned naughtily, "wives have become quite good friends." Images of Mara and Mirax flashed onto the screen. "It appears that Mistress Skywalker crews aboard Mistress Horn's ship…"

Janson plopped himself back down on the settee and reached over Mara to slap Luke's shoulder. "Can't believe you and Horn let these two lovely ladies out of their own, to fly the galaxy…" he winked at Mara before dropping his head back to stick his tongue out at Mirax. He bit down on his tongue in surprise as Mara elbowed him again.

"_Let us_?" Mirax repeated, eyes still trained on the HoloNet, but voice sharp. An image of she and Corran embracing rather heatedly ended Mirax's segment, leading to catcalls and whistles from the crowd gathered in front of the screen.

"You guys…" Mirax laughed, blushing prettily. In an instant, she turned hard eyes to Wes. "Janson…" she growled. She moved over to the settee and Hobbie moved away quickly. She sat down next to Wes, and he looked back and forth between her scowling face and Mara's.

"Uh… Nice smuggler, nice _ex_-assassin…" he said, emphasizing the 'ex'. He turned panicked eyes to Luke.

Luke shook his head, suppressing a grin.

"Don't even look to me for help," Corran laughed from across the room.

Luke stood from the settee as Leia, Tendra, and Shada moved towards it, in an apparent display of feminine solidarity. Iella grinned at Wedge and moved to join them, all standing over Wes, still seated, with Mara and Mirax on either side of him.

"Um…" Wes looked at all the women, smiling. "Relax, ladies, there's enough of me to go around…" He grinned winningly at the ladies, but squeaked as Mara and Mirax each grabbed one of his ears. "Peace?" he offered, then, meekly.

"Uh-uh, Janson," Mirax purred, "We want something else."

Wes gulped.

"That's right…" Mara took up where Mirax had left off, glancing around at her fellow 'sisters'. "We want… sustenance."

The women all grinned, and began listing what exactly they wanted to eat from the kitchen. Wes listened dutifully before raising from the settee with a heaved upon sigh and moving gingerly through the crowd. "Lucky for me, they're getting soft in their old age…" he stage whispered, ducking as Mara threw a book at him. The women broke into laughter as he left the room, and Luke looked at the other men and grinned. 

"Better Janson than us!" Han called, earning a whack in the ribs from his wife.

The HoloNet was running an advertisement as Luke reclaimed his spot next to Mara, who gave him a quick kiss, before entwining her hand with his on her thigh. 

"Welcome back, NR!" Nabrina'vida began again from the holoscreen. "We're back, and more alluring than ever with your top 49 picks for sexiest citizens…"

Maybe things wouldn't be as bad as he thought with this program, Luke mused, even smiling at Nabrina'vida's infectious laugh. Everyone seemed affable enough, and Mara hadn't pressed him for details on his _Falcon_ tryst or any of the other incidences from his past Rogue Squadron seemed to be trying to bring up. And, he thought---with any luck, she wouldn't.

Warm lips brushed his ear. "Keep telling yourself that, Farmboy," Mara whispered.

Luke sighed. On second thought, maybe he'd go help Wes in the kitchen. 

-----

_hmmm... We can't get any thanks out for the reviews on the last chapter. Sorry, not sure what's going on! Thank you all so much for reading! _


	4. Chapter 4

-----

"Run out of ale, did they Skywalker??" Mara eyed the pair of multi-coloured drinks in his hand with suspicion.

Luke shrugged as he sat down and handed her the small bottle. "Wes suggested it," he said.

"Only barely-legal girls drink this stuff." Mara took a tentative sip, but didn't make another comment and took a larger taste. Luke smiled to himself and turned back to the holoscreen.

"We're just over half-way through our delectable list of galactic sexiness," Nabrina'vida wriggled her hips and grinned seductively. "At Number 49 we have a man who's a little hard to describe. He's been a smuggler and an honest business man, a rogue trader _and_ a general in the rebel Alliance. According to our viewers there is no one who plays better Sabacc or looks better in a cape. I am, of course, talking about the man who can make me his lady luck anytime; Lando Calrissian!"

The room erupted into whistles and shouts. Lando, however, instead of being pleased with his placing on the list, looked rather crestfallen. "Only number 49?" He said in astonishment to Tendra at his side. She rubbed his back comfortingly, but Luke noticed she looked strangely guilty, and wondered why. Everyone else seemed too focussed on teasing Lando to notice his wife's change in demeanour, particularly Mara, who was giggling beside him. It was a strange sight for the simple fact that Mara _never_ giggled. Obviously the thought of Lando being displeased with his placing gave her a sort of girlish, delightful pleasure.

"No one can dispute the appeal of this one-time Baron," Nabrina'vida was saying as various images flashed across the screen. "Just as the many, many ladies who have shared his life." The images played more rapidly, showing Lando with many different women of various looks, ages and species.

"They're going too fast!" Han slurred from behind the couch as he tried to count the women on his fingers. 

"That's for sure," Wes shook his head in disbelief as more and more women were shown. "You have a gift, my friend. You have to give me an' Hobbie some pointers."

Mara snorted. "If he was a woman you'd all be disparaging her character, not asking for advice."

"If he was a woman, he wouldn't be landing those kind of chicks!" Wedge laughed.

"What are you insinuating?" Lando was looking more insulted by the second. "That I wouldn't make a pretty girl?"

"Not with that moustache," Mirax muttered into her drink, and dissolved into giggles.

"Awwww," Tendra soothed her husband, putting her arms around his neck. "I would love you even if you were a woman." She kissed his temple. "You'd still have those gorgeous dimples." 

"But Lando doesn't have dimples," Han queried, squinting his eyes and leaning forward just to make sure.

"I didn't say they were on his face," Tendra responded wickedly, causing the women in the room to laugh while the boys all squirmed and groaned in disgust. And then Lando did something Luke did not think him capable of: He blushed.

Meanwhile, Nabrina'vida was continuing with her spiel, going into detail about many of Lando's short-lived relationships. Luke watched rather disinterestedly until Mara's name was mentioned.

"There are some doubts as to whether this relationship actually happened, but these two former smugglers sure gave a good impression of it!" Images of Lando and Mara together flashed up on the screen, in various stages of embrace.

"Had to scour myself clean after that mission," Mara murmured beside him.

"Oh, come on, Jade," Lando taunted, his pride obviously still hurting. "It wasn't that bad."

"What you mean the constant nicknames, the whistling, the costumes you made me wear?" Mara huffed in disgust.

"We had to match!" Lando insisted. "It wouldn't do for the galaxy to think that Lando Calrissian was dating a woman whose sense of style ranged from black to black." 

"You did look good together," Han added with a grin. "Especially that time we commed you on Chadis - "

"When I was _undercover_!"

Sensing that the exchange of words would go on for quite a while, Luke turned his attention back to the holoscreen, hoping he wouldn't get drawn into the argument. He sat disinterestedly watching the countdown until a familiar face flashed onto the screen. Nabrina'vida was begrudgingly examining number 45, a blue-skinned Twi'lek. Apparently she was an actress who had hit her peak of popularity several years earlier, but still had a devoted following. Luke was certain he recognised her face from elsewhere, he just couldn't quite place her… Nabrina'vida mentioned something about a rumored nose-job that made Luke squint at the screen, trying to remember…

"Wait a minute," Han's voice cut through Luke's ruminations. "I'd know that scantily-clad figure anywhere." He walked closer to the holoscreen to get a better look.

It was then that the memories came flooding back to Luke as a sense of dread washed over him.

"She's…" Han abruptly stopped, throwing Luke an apologetic glance.

"Well out with it Solo!" Corran prodded him.

Han cleared his throat. "Well, actually, now that I look at her, she isn't who I thought."

No one bought that paltry excuse for a second, and all began clamouring for Han to divulge. Luke sat stony-faced, waiting for the inevitable. Eventually Han could no longer withstand the barrage of demands and with another regretful look, began to speak. "She, uh…" he seemed to be searching for appropriately delicate words. "I believe she was the aforementioned female who I, uh…caught with Luke on the Falcon."

The room once again erupted into riotous laughter. "How do you guys get so lucky?" Hobbie lamented. "I need to incorporate 'Baron' or 'Jedi' into my pick-up lines."

"It wasn't like that," Luke quickly said, turning towards Mara, who looked less than pleased, probably not due to incident itself, but rather that Luke had never divulged it to her. "I honestly forgot about that incident, that's why I didn't tell you," he added softly.

"How do you forget a body like that?" Wes' eyes were glued to the holoscreen. "Although from what I've heard, her _mind_ is a little slippery, but I'm sure that didn't deter you, Boss!"

"That's just an image the media's constructed," Luke protested. "She's quite intelligent when you get to know her."

Wedge snorted. "I _bet_ she knows a thing or two."

"It wasn't like that!" Luke repeated.

"Well, then, how exactly did you wind up in her…company?" Mara asked less than warmly. 

"Sound like someone's jealous," Lando taunted, seemingly happy the attention had shifted off his placing.

"I am not jealous of that blue bimbo!"

"I met her at a function," Luke quickly interrupted before Lando and Mara could bicker each other to death. "I can't remember which one. I didn't know who she was, and she was thankful to talk to someone who wasn't drooling all over her holofilm roles." He shot a glance at Wes and Hobbie. "She didn't know a lot about the Jedi, so it was refreshing for me as well. We went out a few times – discreetly," he added. "But one day the holopress were chasing…one of us at least, and the Falcon was right there in the hanger…" he trailed off, face unbearably hot.

"So she decided to show you her gratitude?" Mara asked scathingly.

"No…I…" he sighed. "It's difficult to explain."

"I sympathise with you Mara," Iella said from across the room. "I don't know what it is about blue-skinned women." She gave her husband a disparaging look.

Wedge sighed. "I've never known what you had against Qwi," he said. "She was going through a tough time, and I was just giving her some comfort."

"So was I," Luke chimed in.

Han laughed heartily. "Sexual therapy, eh, Luke?"

"Damsels in distress," Iella muttered disparagingly.

"Tell me about it," Mara murmured.

Leia, who up until then remained silent, suddenly became the victim of Mara's next accusation. "I'm sure you don't approve of your dear brother's behaviour?" she asked her. 

"I didn't," Leia answered calmly. "At the time." 

"You knew about her?" Mara was clearly not expecting that response.

"Are you kidding?" Leia answered. "Han couldn't _wait_ to tell me all about it." She rolled her eyes.

"Yes, well," Han cleared his throat again. "Who wants another drink?"

-----


	5. Chapter 5

-----

A chorus of groans met Han's question. "What'd I say?" he widened his eyes innocently.

Mara glared at him, before looking around the room and stopping on Wes, who was about to take an enormous bite of a sandwich he held in his hand. "Where's the food you promised, Janson?"

He smiled hugely around a bite of his nerf-burger, nodding his head at a tray of the sandwiches in front of him.

Mara wrinkled her nose, but accepted a sandwich from the tray, anyway.

Leia took one of the sandwiches and frowned at Wes. "Where did you find these?"

"In the freezer," Wes mumbled, biting into his second burger.

"But these are for the children," Leia said, looking at the sandwich, forehead slightly wrinkled.

Han grinned and nudged his wife. "Come on, Your Worship, one burger isn't going to hurt your lovely figure."

Leia opened her mouth to answer, when Han choked on a bite of his sandwich.

On the holoscreen, Nabrina'vida was grinning widely in front of a holo of Han and Chewbacca. "…he certainly fits the bill of one who is tall, dark, and handsome," she said, gesturing towards the holo with more than just her finger. 

Han moaned. "I can't be on the list already," he pouted, looking at the number 39 flashing on the screen repeatedly. 

More groans followed this statement, until Chewie began roaring towards the screen.

Nabrina'vida grinned naughtily at her audience, standing before a now lone holo of Chewie. "Tall, dark, and handsome," she sashayed around the holo. "Surely you didn't think I meant his sexy sidekick…"

"_Side_kick!" Han's eyes grew wide, and he elbowed the laughing Wookie in the side. "Laugh it up, buddy," he muttered darkly, eyeing the program and ignoring the shouts of laughter surrounding him. 

"That's right, ladies," the tittering Twi'lek continued from the holoscreen, "with Chewbacca you'll have a mate with hair you'd be able to run your fingers through, so long as you don't mind a few of those stray hairs on your settee, that is." Nabrina'vida winked.

Several holos of Chewbacca flashed on the screen, as Nabrina'vida kept a running commentary on his exploits and honors of valor. More than half of the images of the Wookie featured Han, though one grainy holo of Chewie and his mate Malla was shown. "And if long hair and raw meat just isn't your thing, remember, ladies: Out of most of the males on this list, Chewbacca is one male who is in it for the long haul, redefining the meaning of commitment." More holos of Han and Chewie flashed, Lando guffawing and slapping Han on the back as the segment ended. 

"Looking good in those shots, old buddy," Lando grinned. 

"At least I wasn't beaten by a Wookie," Han growled. "No offense, Pal," he flashed a smile at Chewie, who rolled his eyes, before ambling off to holocom his mate.

Tycho and Winter stood to take their leave, politely excusing themselves from the ruckus with the excuse of Tycho's early flight runs in the morning. Leia grabbed at Han's arm to walk the pair to the door and exchanged a long hug with her childhood friend, almost a thanks for putting up with the party so long. Back in the Solo's common room, several more sexy citizens passed on the countdown, while the small crowd downed several plates of the burgers Wes had put so much time into preparing.

"Why is my burger still frozen?" Hobbie asked, spitting the remains of frozen nerf into a napkin.

Wes, downing yet another sandwich, shrugged. "Mine taste fine." He muttered under his breath, "I slave over a hot oven and all the thanks I get…"

"Luke!" Leia, entering the room again with Han, pointed to the holoscreen.

Luke's blue eyes widened. "Turn that up," he said, not waiting for anyone to do it for him, but locating the remote device and doing it himself.

A faded holo of Anakin Skywalker was prominent on the screen. The hostess was inspecting him carefully. "…hero, like his son. A major sex-symbol of his day, Anakin Skywalker was the total package: A Jedi who went against the grain to exude more than morals with his raw sensuality. One only need look at his offspring to see that the Skywalker Sex Appeal is live, and well." A holo of Luke and Leia together flashed, before Nabrina'vida grinned widely at the audience. "But more about that sexy duo later."

"Skywalker Sex Appeal!" Han hooted. "Leia, sure, but you should have seen Luke when I picked him up, straight off the farm, blushing over his _sister's_ touch to his hand."

Luke's cheeks didn't pinken, however, so entranced was he by seeing his father on the galactic HoloNet.

"What good is it if he doesn't hear?" Han nudged Lando, who nodded.

Nabrina'vida wasn't done with the Skywalkers apparently, however. "There is one question that begs to be asked, however, when looking at the Skywalker children. Their father is, of course, Anakin Skywalker, but who is their mother? With a bit of digging into holonews archives…" 

Wedge snorted. "That's one avenue you never thought to explore, eh, Luke?"

"Shhh!" Leia snapped, sinking down onto the settee beside her brother.

"…two main suspects for the role of 'mother' to our own Luke and Leia: a Mirialan, named Barriss Offee, or a senator from Naboo, named Amidala Naberrie. Of course, these were just two of the many women who were linked with Anakin Skywalker, The Hero Without Fear…" Nabrina'vida went on to list several other women, prominent at the height of the Clone Wars, including several holostars and news personalities.

"Do you think…" Leia trailed off, looking at the images of the women as they were played on the holoscreen, matched up with pictures of she and Luke.

"I don't know," Luke breathed, eyes glued to the screen.

"…Offee, as Luke, Leia, and Anakin are all obviously human. Which leaves Amidala, once queen of Naboo. Records are scarce, but according to more than one report from the time, Anakin Skywalker was seen with this royal senator." Nabrina'vida smiled. "Given my two credits, I'd say that Skywalker may have had a fling with the senator that resulted in his children, but given his son's predilection towards us near-humans," a holo of younger Luke and a green Twi'lek flashed, "I wouldn't count the Mirialan out." The Twi'lek's voice was practically a purr as she finished.

Luke flushed, turning to Mara, who's eyebrow was raised. "That was a blind date." He looked towards Wes accusingly, who grinned.

"What can I say? Luke and I have good taste."

Corran, passing by, punched Wes in the shoulder. "Let me guess… You were trying to ask the Twi'lek out, but once she realized you knew Skywalker…"

"Don't remind me," Wes grumbled, comforting himself with the last nerf-burger. "Damn groupies."

Several more people passed on the list with little comment, beings that weren't well known to any in the group. Just before number 25 on the list was announced, Nabrina'vida appeared in a new outfit, which consisted of a few triangles of gold fabric pieced together and held in strategic places by little more than delicate gold chains.

"Almost like your outfit from Jabba's palace," Han said out of the side of his mouth to Leia.

"…Number 25 needs almost no introduction," the impish Twi'lek simpered from the screen. "She is the reigning Miss Coruscant and a contender in the title of Miss Universe. Voted "Sexiest Smile of the Year" by Coruscant Weekly, she's been known to receive fan mail from all corners of the galaxy." The darkened out image of a female, obviously Twi'lek was displayed. "Not only is she friends with several of the galaxy's most notable citizens, she's recently been linked romantically to holo-action star, Fyor Antilles," Nabrina'vida flashed a wide, sexy grin. "Coming in at number 25 on our list of Sexiest Citizens of the Galaxy is… Me!"

Hobbie snorted. "She's certainly purple panache," he grinned. All the males watched as several holos of their hostess were shown, while the female in question kept up a running list of her qualifications and attributes. 

"Yes, she certainly seems qualified," Lando said appreciatively, eyes wide as Nabrina'vida performed the dance she had apparently won her Miss Coruscant title with. Tendra frowned at him and took a swift drink of the ale she still had in her hand. 

"But before all the glamour, I was a young wide-eyed girl trying to make my way on this huge city-planet, and I landed my first job as a reporter with Coruscant City Times. My first assignment was on the red carpet at Chief of State Organa-Solo's first State Ball. You can imagine who I saw there--but the only one to stop and give me an interview…"

"Skywalker!" Mara said, looking at her husband. Her eyebrow seemed permanently arched.

"It wasn't me!" Luke said, voice higher than he would have liked.

"…Wedge Antilles!"

All eyes turned to Wedge.

"It was just an interview!" he said, barely squirming under the weight of his friends' gazes.

"At least you don't have a Twi'lek fetish," Iella said

"Uh-huh," Luke said, beating Wes and Hobbie to the punch. He raised his hands at the glare he received from Wedge.

All eyes were back on Luke.

"What?!" he said. "Look, I dated… what? Three Twi'leks? I dated a lot more humans and _married_ one… I don't hear you saying anything about a human fetish!"

"Well, there is your well-known redhead fetish…" Wes said, helpfully.

"Should I be flattered?" Mara asked dryly.

"Yes," Wes answered. "Some of those redheads were real Hutts…"

Mara couldn't seem to stop a smile from spreading across her face.

On the HoloNet, a younger Wedge was flirting through an "interview" with their hostess, who seemed more interested in touching Wedge than speaking to him. An older, and very married Wedge squirmed uncomfortably in his chair while watching.

"…you Rogues are certainly well-built," the Twi'lek purred, squeezing his arm. 

"Part of the job," he flashed his lady-killer grin at the holocam.

"Just an interview?" Iella elbowed her husband. 

Wedge didn't look quite as jovial as he did on screen. "Yes, dear."

Nabrina'vida continued to list her virtues, and paraded holo after holo of herself for far longer than any other celebrity citizen had been shown.

"I'd rather look at her than Chewie," Wes allowed. Most of the men seemed to nod in agreement, if only behind their wives backs.

After their hostesses segment, the countdown ran quickly to make-up the time lost in her piece, and the company crowded in the Solo's family room watched and sipped at their drinks, surprisingly few comments flying, until Nabrina'vida began to speak about Citizen number 11.

"This handsome fellow hardly needs an introduction, so well known has he become--not only for his own merits, but for the _friendship_," the busty Twi'lek raised a brow, "he has with one of our Great Republic's most famous wives. A dashing man, with a head full of distinguished black and gray hair, Talon Karrde"… catcalls rang out among the guests in the Solo's home, no member of their immediate circle having made the list since Chewie, at number 39. "…list at number 11 not only for his celebrity ties and good looks, but also because he's a man who probably knows a secret or two about every other person on our list. In fact, Talon Karrde may be the only man who could give you my _exact_ measurements," thrusting out her chest she winked naughtily.

"A little first hand knowledge there?" Lando kidded, grinning out of the side of his mouth at Karrde.

"No," Talon answered, taking a calm sip of his drink while surreptitiously eyeing the holo monitor. "And in any case, I do not divulge my sources."

"Ah, _Citizen Sleuth Holozine_?" Wes asked, listening in. "That's where I get all my insider information."

Shada made a sound somewhere between a snort and a laugh, eyeing Talon sideways. "Your secret is out." 

Karrde didn't answer, eyes widening fractionally instead as on the holoscreen Nabrina'vida inspected a group of holos of himself and Mara together, from her early days with his organization. 

"…interesting that Mara's ex-lover happened to walk her down the aisle at her wedding, adding a whole new angle to 'giving the bride away'… "

Han laughed. "Do you get involved with all your employees, Karrde?" he asked, giving Shada a significant look.

"Mara and I were never involved in … such a manner," he answered, smiling at Mara.

"You and _Mara_, of course not…" Han stressed, turning an eye back to the HoloNet as more blurry images of Talon and Shada appeared. 

"Yes, are you sure there isn't anything you want to tell us, Shada?" Lando teased, raising a rakish brow at the former Mistryl Shadow Guard.

Shada took a deep breath, watching as Nabrina'vida continued to speak about Talon. "Actually, Calrissian, there is something…" she began, placing a hand on Karrde's shoulder.

Lando's eyes grew wide, and the room quiet, as everyone seemed intent on their conversation.

"Yes?" he said. "Go on…"

Wetting her lips, Shada closed her eyes to give her announcement. "Karrde and I… have you down for 200 credits to be in the Top 10. Since you were only number 49... it's time to pay up."

The silence was broken by a laugh from Mara, until the entire room was giggling at the look on Lando's face. Tendra shook her head at Shada and took another long pull of her ale, before taking and squeezing her husband's hand.

During the laughter, as everyone turned back to the HoloNet, Shada gave Mara a subtle wink and a smile.

On the holoscreen, their hostess was positively beaming. "We've made it through 91 of our 101 sexiest NR citizens, and after a quick break, we'll be back with our Top 10... Suffice it to say, you'll recognize quite a few faces, starting with the hunk at number 10." The Twi'lek grinned. "And if you thought you had seen sexy before now… Just wait." 

-----


	6. Chapter 6

-----

"And now it's time for our delectable Top Ten." Nabrina'vida seemingly could not contain her excitement, literally shanking across the screen with anticipation.

The room fell silent as every head turned towards the screen. "Shhh!" Hobbie urged them although no one had uttered a word. Even Luke found himself unconsciously leaning forward, wondering if anyone else he knew would make it into the countdown.

"We begin our top ten with a very special man," Nabrina'vida began. "He began his life as a smuggler, before becoming one of the galaxy's most famous stay at home husbands. That's right, it's Han Solo!"

"What?" Han's face did not match the cocky grin that beamed at them from the holoscreen. In fact, he looked murderous.

"Hey, number ten. Not bad for an old man like you," Wes grinned.

"I would watch who you're calling 'old' Jansen," Karrde called threateningly from the corner.

"Better than my placing, old buddy," Lando said sympathetically.

But Han didn't seem to hear them. "Stay at home husband?" He bellowed, as Leia patted him on the knee.

"I thought you enjoyed staying home," Leia said calmly, obviously trying to keep the amusement out of her expression.

"Not the point!" continued, voice rising.

"You can actually see the veins bulging out of his neck," Mara whispered to Luke, stifling a laugh.

"They must not have polled Corellia," Han said, attempting to calm down.

"Of course," Nabrina'vida's voice spoke over various holos of Han, Leia and their children. "Han Solo's life wasn't always so family-oriented." The images changed to official Republic portraits and Rebellion-era holos. "The once General Solo's military expertise was instrumental in creating the New Republic, and I think you'll agree, he looked great doing it. After all, not many men can pull off carbonite."

And image of Han as Jabba's wall decoration flashed up on screen, and Leia's grip unconsciously tightened on Han's leg. Han himself did not seem too impressed by the compliment either. It was obvious the producers of the show were going to get a choicely-worded call from the Senate Chief in the morning.

On screen, the format had changed to pre-recorded interviews as Nabrina'vida, in a different outfit, sat in an interview room. "There are few beings, human or otherwise, that know not just the General, the smuggler, or the pilot, but the man himself." She moved her microphone at the interviewee was revealed to be a familiar gold-plated protocol droid.

"And my nightmare is complete," Han groaned.

"Tell me, Threepio," Nabrina'vida batted her eyelashes. "What is it about Han Solo that made out viewers vote him the tenth sexiest being in the galaxy?"

'Well, of course objectivity is built into my programming," Threepio began importantly. "But I have heard many ladies compliment General Solo's posterior. I'm not sure how, but apparently the tightness of his pants directly affects their body temperature. If they ever received treatment for this affliction, I do not know."

"I know I've never recovered from it." Leia's mood brightened immediately as she nuzzled Han's neck.

"Me either!" Hobbie joked drunkenly, and the room exploded into laughter once again. "What?" Hobbie added, "a man can't admire another man's pants without there being an ulterior motive?"

"You're just jealous, my friend," Wes slapped Hobbie upside the head.

"Absolutely!" Hobbie rejoined. "You know how many lovely rebel ladies I lost to those pants?"

Meanwhile, on the holoscreen, Threepio had started to sing a rendition of his much maligned song; _The Virtues of King Han Solo!_

"Oh my gods" Han buried his head in his hands.

"…Wookies love him, women love him. He's got a winning smile!" Threepio crooned. "Though he may seem cool and cocky, he's more sensitive than he seems..."

"That is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard," Shada cut in straight-faced.

"Han Solo. What a man, Solo!" Luke and Lando joined in playfully, as their respective wives gave them looks that clearly meant they thought them mentally disturbed. "He's every princess's dream!" they finished with flourish.

"I knew that song would come back to haunt me," Han shot Luke a dirty look.

"Haunt _you_?" Corran spoke up. "That damn thing's going to be in my head for days!"

"Of course," Threepio continued in his regular voice on the holoscreen. "Even a droid fluent in over six million forms of communication would have trouble understanding him sometimes."

"Yes, thank you Threepio," Nabrina'vida tried to cut him off.

But the droid nattered on regardless. "Well, I can remember several times when I've done nothing but tell him the truth, and he simply wouldn't listen!"

Nabrina'vida smiled but made subtle 'cutting' motions to the screen. Luke couldn't help but think she'd met her match in the talkative droid.

"…in fact I do believe I interrupted his and Princess Leia's first kiss – of course a broom cupboard on that dreadful ship isn't what I would call romantic - "

The interview was abruptly cut off and the holoscreen returned to Nabrina'vida in the studio.

"Your ship sees a lot of action, Solo!" Wes laughed.

"Yeah," Han shot Luke another look. "If only it had all been mine."

"Here's an interview with some of Han' other fans – of the flesh and bone variety," Nabrina'vida simpered, preening for the camera. "They call themselves the Falconites – the official Han Solo fanclub. Our sources say it has the second-largest membership of any pilot's fanclub in the galaxy."

The images shifted to another pre-recorded interview with two female humans and an Ewok. "So, ladies," Nabrina'vida pointed her microphone at them. "As representatives of the Falconites, is Han Solo sexy?"

"Oh, yes!" One of the women answered. "Just look at those pants!"

"But surely there's more to a man than pants," Nabrina'vida asked slyly.

"Absolutely," the second woman chimed in. "It's the way he flies his ship, his sense of humour, his military record…he's actually done some good for this galaxy, unlike a certain other person."

The Ewok growled.

The first woman made a disgusted face. "We Falconites have made a solemn pact to boycott all products from Hapes. We know Madam Solo has to deal with them because of her work, but we do it to show support for our man and not that pumped-up galactic pincushion."

The Ewok nodded enthusiastically.

Han was looking rather pleased with himself. "I like these ladies," he grinned.

"I think they're nuts," Mara said disparagingly. "It's all compliments and fawning until one of them steals your underpants, Solo."

"I'm not worried," Han shrugged.

"Only because he doesn't wear underpants," Leia smiled, causing Wedge to choke on the drink he had been working on.

"Thanks Leia," he said sarcastically. "Now I have a mental image I can take to the grave."

"Me too," said Iella, poking her husband teasingly in the ribs.

Nabrina'vida appeared back in the studio. "And now onto the next in our countdown," she smiled seductively as she spoke. "Another man I once knew _very_ well, and someone who very narrowly edged out Han Solo for the placing…it's Prince Isolder of Hapes!"

"What?" Han's reaction was similar to the announcement of his own name.

"That's actually quite surprising," Mara said quietly to Luke. "The Hapans don't care to participate in such trivial matters, and you would imagine that's where most of his votes would come from…"

"It's no secret what our viewers see in him," Nabrina'vida sauntered across screen while images of Isolder flashed up. "He's the perfect package – something I can assure you all of!" She winked and giggled at the camera.

Han grunted dismissively. "You just can't trust a man who wears all of those poncy robes."

Luke raised his eyebrow at his brother-in-law.

"Well, not you of course, Luke," Han back-peddled. "Yours are…different."

"At least I've actually changed my outfit in the past ten years, Han," Luke reminded him.

Han looked down – there was no denying that what he was wearing was almost a replica of his outfit when he'd picked Luke and Obi-Wan up on Tatooine. "Those who wear black clothes shouldn't throw fashion tips, kid," he replied.

"I have to agree with you on the Isolder thing, Han," Lando spoke up. "I mean, look at that guy," he gestured to the holoscreen. "Now a cape is stylish; sophisticated. But silken robes, with his chest hanging out? Pathetic," Lando scoffed.

"He wasn't all that bad," Leia said diplomatically. "He was a little self-absorbed -"

"Not to mention conceited, vain, arrogant…" Han counted off the synonyms on his fingers. "On the other hand, he did save Luke from that Force Witch," he pointed out.

"Teneniel was not a 'Force Witch'," Luke said tiredly, wondering how the conversation kept swinging back to him.

"You gotta admit though, Luke, if she hadn't transferred her affection that postulating puss-bomb you'd still be chained up in her room with her making googly eyes at you."

"Not if I had anything to do with it," Mara added darkly.

"Or me." Leia nodded protectively.

"Oh, it looks like Isolder has a fan club as well," Luke feebly tried to turn the attention back to the holoscreen.

Nabrina'vida was interviewing a trio of stoic Hapes women, looking enviously at their sumptuous and revealing clothes.

Han snorted again. "Those are just his bodyguards," he said dismissively. "Trust old princey to have to _pay_ women to talk him up."

"Who votes for these things anyway?" It seemed that Mirax was starting to get bored. "I mean, they can't be too intelligent, if the likes of Isolder get top placings. What's the point of a good-looking blaster if it can't fire right?"

Tendra chose that moment to rise from her seat. "I think I need to stretch my legs. Would you like me to check on the kids, Leia?"

"Sure," Leia answered, a bit bemused. "If you'd like to."

Luke, feeling that he'd had enough of the program as well, started to get to his feet as well. "I'll help you," he said. "They can be a handful."

"No!" Tendra said a little too forcefully. "I mean…I can handle it," she stammered, a slight blush beginning to creep into her face.

Mara pulled him back down by the back of his trousers. "You're staying right here, Farmboy," she ordered. "You haven't been in the countdown yet," she said slyly, patting him on the leg.

Luke didn't care to give her a retort, and turned back to the holoscreen, where Nabrina'vida was introducing number eight, Face Loran.

"Typical," said Shada. "Another holostar."

"Hey, he's a good guy," Wedge cut in. "A damn good pilot."

"There is no doubt to the galactic appeal of this shining star," Nabrina'vida was saying on the holoscreen. "We think back fondly on his early films such as _The Spy from Naboo_ and _Dissenters Defeated_, his appearance in them making us forget that they were propaganda."

"I don't think he'll ever be able to live those down," Hobbie remarked, his drunkenness seeming to ebb slightly.

"Although he has been linked with several influential women, the latest being our lovely number twenty-eight Nahal D'jour, there have been rumours circulating that this relationship is not all that it seems to be." Nabrina'vida leaned forward to give the audience a fuller view of her cleavage. "He has in fact resisted my charms more than once…an the viewer can read into that what they will." She winked again. "Now let's look at some interviews with his nearest and dearest…"

Luke rubbed his eyes and leaned back against the couch. Only seven more placings to go. Surely it couldn't be too much longer before he could subtly suggest to Mara that they could leave quietly and make the night far more active back at their apartment. Mara however, seemed to be enthralled by the programme. But Luke just wasn't sure how much more he could take. Did he dare guess who might be in the last seven placings?

-----

_Thanks for all the wonderful reviews! We're glad you enjoy the fic as much as we do. :)_


	7. Chapter 7

--

"What's that noise?" Wes asked, grabbing the remote device and muting Nabrina'vida's interview of number 7, a Devaronian underwear model.

"What noi--" Luke tried to ask.

"Shhh…" Wes cut him off. "I could swear that I hear a kitling's purr."

Leia shook her head. "Not unless Jacen--"

"Wait!" Wes cut her off, too. "I hear it again. It's coming from…" He swung around and faced Wedge and Iella. Wedge's hand was underneath his wife, and his movements caused her to shift in response.

"Do we even _want_ to know what you two are doing?" he asked dryly, looking at the couple over the back of the settee, causing the rest of the room to break out in chuckles.

Iella's cheeks flushed a deep red as she shot out of her husband's lap. Wedge fished his comm from his trouser pocket. The frantic meowing intensified.

"You have a little kitty call tone?" Wes snickered. "Mew Mew, Commander." Hobbie guffawed, ducking his head when Iella flashed him a glare.

"I changed it for my daughters," Wedge growled. He answered the com. "Hello?" he asked, instantly putting on his soothing 'dad' voice.

"Daddy," a small voice whimpered from the comm. "I hate the babysitter. She's mean!"

"What are you doing out of bed? Are you on the comm? General Antilles?" an older voice cut in. "I'm sorry, I didn't realize Syal had the comm. But while we have you, Syal has something she wants to tell you."

"No I don't," the little voice insisted.

"Syal," Wedge said, voice dropped in warning.

Syal mumbled something.

"What was that?"

"Maybe we'd better take this in the other room," Iella said, directing Wedge with a hand on his arm.

"I said, I told Myri to hide in the closet and told the babysitter I was an only child."

"You did what? Is Myri okay?" Iella stopped in the doorway, and asked into the comm.

"She's fine, Mrs. Antilles," the babysitter said. "We got it all straightened out eventually."

"Why would you do that, Syal?" Wedge asked.

"Uncle Wes said it would be a funny prank…"

"Oh, _Uncle Wes_ did, did he?" Wedge turned and glowered at Wes just as he and Iella left the room.

Wes's eyes bulged. "Uh--come on, Hobbie. I think maybe you and I should go and… Um.. See what Chewie's up to. Yeah. Come on."

"I want to see the countdown," Hobbie said, looking forward and unmuting the holovid.

Nabrina'vida was still drooling over the Devaronian, showing holo after holo of him in differing poses, and types of undergarments. "With his sexy smirk, red skin, and large horns, Liels Vant is any woman's devilish dream…" Vant, obviously a favorite of the hostess, had a few more holos flashed.

"But… I'd rather take a dip in bacta than watch that," Hobbie grimaced, leaving the room with Wes.

"I'd have to agree," Lando said. "Think I'll go help Tendra check on the children."

Leia started picking up empty ale bottles. "Help me gather these, Han. It's looking like a spaceport bar in here."

"Yes, dear," he said, picking up several bottles and following her into the kitchen.

--

"The room is emptying pretty quickly," Corran noticed, pulling his wife closer in the chair they shared.

"I think the countdown is getting a bit tiresome," Mirax said. "We all just want to know who's in the top spots."

"I think you should have been number 1," Corran whispered, tucking a strand of dark hair behind his wife's ear. "No one else even comes close."

"Sweet-talker." She grinned and leaned in for a quick kiss. Her husband, however, had a different idea, and held her closer, deepening the kiss.

Breaking away, Mirax peeked over his shoulder, at Karrde and Shada who were looking over a piece of flimsiplast and at Luke and Mara, seated close together on the settee in front of the holovid, but not paying it, or them, any attention.

"No one cares if I kiss my wife," Corran said lowly, chuckling. He attached his lips to a spot just under her ear.

"Corran," she gasped out. "This isn't the place…"

"No?" he asked, in mock surprise. "What about here?" He suckled lightly at the base of her neck.

"Corran," a different female voice said this time.

Mirax squeaked and looked up at Shada. Corran raised his head. "Yes?" he asked.

Shada's lips twitched. "It appears that you owe us 50 credits. You had Face Loran down for first place."

"No one else for first place, huh, flyboy?" Mirax turned steely, if amused, eyes to her husband.

Corran's eyes widened. "No, see, I just… he was an actor! I just figured more people would know him… and…"

"You're cute when you're flustered." Mirax smiled.

"He'll be even cuter when he pays up his creds," Shada said.

Corran groaned. "Can't I transfer them to you tomorrow?" He looked at Shada's unsmiling face. "Okay, guess not. Hey, who's that on the countdown?" he asked, digging out his wallet and exacting the credits.

Mirax snorted. "Mara's favorite man," she said, laughing when Mara's head swiveled towards the holovid unit.

"Kyp?" she asked. "Oh, great. Just what we need. Another reason for Durron to think he's the gods' gift to us all."

Nabrina'vida fawned over the young Jedi. "Misguided though he may have been at one time, no one can deny the appeal of a bad boy turned right."

Shada looked at the flimsiplast in her hand as more and more holos of Kyp were shown. She opened her mouth to speak, but closed it when Corran thrust another 20 credits into her hand. "I know, I know," he said.

Shada laughed and walked off with her credits.

Mirax turned to her husband. "Kyp?"

"Hells, no," Corran rolled his eyes. He pulled her back down into his lap. "I had you down for number 6."

"Oh." She lay her head on his shoulder. "Hold on," she said, popping up. "Only number 6?"

"What is it about Jedi?" Nabrina'vida continued with her assessment of Kyp. "Is it the idea that a Jedi will do simply _anything_ to make you happy? Or that a Jedi can discern your desires before you can even think them? Or is it just that so many of them have sexy, brooding stares?" Several more holos of Kyp flashed, all showing him with tousled hair, pouty lips and haunted eyes.

Mara rolled her eyes before turning to her own Jedi.

Luke frowned at her. "Kyp's really changed, Mara. Perhaps you should give him the benefit of the doubt."

"Forget Kyp," she said. Noticing Corran and Mirax playfully arguing in the corner, she turned to their bond. --I want to know what spot you think you'll have on the list.--

Luke stared at her blankly. --I don't think I'm going to be on the list.--

Mara snorted. --Don't try to be modest. You know you're going to be on this list. What name is better known than Luke Skywalker?--

--Um… Ponc Gavrisom?-- Luke guessed.

--Not even close.--

--Come on, Mara. I'm not…-- he gestured to the holovid.

--Not Kyp? Thank the gods,-- she thought dryly.

--No, Mara! I'm not… you know…--

Mara gave him a sly look. --Is the Jedi Master fishing for compliments?--

Luke flushed. "No," he said aloud. "I just…"

--Because if we were alone, I'd show you just how sexy I find you…-- Mara sent a few images that raised Luke's temperature and the flush on his face considerably.

He leaned in close and took one of her hands into his. "Yeah?" he asked, his voice low and husky.

"Oh, yeah," she whispered back, trailing a finger from her free hand down the curve of his jaw. "In fact--"

A thud and a yelp behind them caused them to turn quickly to look over the back of the settee, where Corran and Mirax were dusting themselves off after falling from their chair and into the floor.

"Are you all right?" Luke asked.

"Need to practice a little with your moves there, CorSec," Mara teased, grinning as the flush on his and Mirax's faces grew more noticeable.

"Uh… we couldn't see around you to the holovid," Mirax answered.

"Sure." Mara grinned at them.

"Anyway," Corran cleared his throat. "You two were making enough racket in the Force to distract me."

Mara narrowed her eyes. "What?"

"You… You could hear that?" Luke glanced at his wife, and noticed a slight blush beginning to creep along her fair skin.

Corran nodded before breaking into laughter. "No, just a guess, but it must have been something from the way you two are blushing."

Luke restrained his wife from jumping over the back of the settee.

--

In the kitchen, Leia dropped her armload of bottles into the recycler and left it open for Han to do the same. Leaning against the counter, she sighed. "I'm enjoying the company, but this party is going on a bit longer than I imagined."

"Yeah, stupid holovid program." He slammed the recycler shut.

Leia hid a smile, wrapping an arm around his waist as he passed and pulling him to her. "Number 10 is a fantastic placing, Han."

"But I was beaten by that… that…"

"Poncy idiot?" Leia smiled up at him.

Han narrowed his eyes. "You're the one that said he wasn't so bad," he reminded her, lips turned out in a pout.

"Not so bad, but not so good, either. He's certainly no Corellian," she purred, pulling him down for a kiss.

Drawing back after a moment, Han grinned at her. "That's right, Your Worship. You never would have been happy with him. He probably spends more time getting ready in the morning than you do."

Leia gave him a hard look.

"Well, your time in the 'fresher is well worth it," Han backtracked.

Leia sighed. "Kiss me, you nerf-herder. At least if your lips are occupied, you can't get into any trouble."

Han readily complied.

--

"The kids all tucked in?" Lando asked, coming up on his wife in the hall and sliding his arms around her waist.

Tendra jumped against him, startled. "Lando! What? Oh, yes. They're fine. Sleeping like angels."

Lando turned her in his arms, and looked deeply into her eyes. "Tendra, my sweet, are you all right? You've been a bit jumpy tonight."

"Jumpy?" Tendra's voice raised an octave. "Jumpy? No, whatever gave you that idea? I'm just excited to be here with our friends."

"It has been awhile since we've seen them," Lando agreed. "But I know that you don't know everyone as well as I do. I hope they're not making you uncomfortable."

Tendra gave him a shaky smile. "Uncomfortable? No, no. Not at all. They're all lovely."

He laughed. "Apparently quite a few of them are 'sexy', too."

"Not as sexy as you are…" Tendra threw her arms around him, and kissed him, long and hard.

--

"Chewie?" Wes palmed open the door where the Solo's holocomm was kept.

Chewbacca looked over, shutting down his holocall. _You have good timing. I was just hanging up with Malla._

"Oh, and was she watching? What did she think of your placing?" Hobbie asked, sitting in a chair near the comm station.

_She was very pleased._ Chewie barred his teeth in a grin. _What are the two of you doing in here?_

"Uh…" Wes stalled.

_That bad?_

"No, no, just--wait, what was that?" A thud against the door drew their attention and Hobbie opened the door, watching as Lando and Tendra practically fell into the room, from a heated clinch.

"Didn't you two already fall for one another?" Wes asked.

Hobbie groaned. "That was really bad, Wes."

"I know, I think I need more ale. Come on."

--

In the main hall, Wedge clicked off his comm, and placed it on vibrate, for good measure. Iella looked up at him and giggled. "Do you think she'll really go to bed now?"

"Who knows? Maybe she'll convince the babysitter that she actually doesn't need to sleep."

"Well, I think you handled it all very well, Daddy." She leaned up and brushed a kiss across his mouth.

"Ugh," Wes said, walking in and interrupting them. "When did this become a make-out party?" He turned to a snickering Hobbie. "And how come I'm always stuck with you?"

"You want to make-out with Hobbie?" Wedge asked, cuffing Wes on the arm.

"Nah, I'm not furry enough to be his type." Hobbie laughed.

"Now I really need that ale," Wes said, barging into the kitchen, only to quickly come right back out, cheeks slightly pink.

"Uh… Leia and Han said they'd meet us in the family room."

--

"Who'd we miss?" Wes asked, plunking himself down next to Mara.

"A Devaronian underwear model, and Kyp Durron," Luke answered for her. "Now they're up to number 5, though Nabrina'vida hasn't told who it is yet."

On the screen, the hostess smiled widely at her enthralled audience. "Welcome back. Now we're in the sexiest of the sexy's. And here, at number 5, you get two for the price of one. Number 5 on our list is those notorious party-girls, Daesha'dira and Dia'dira!"

Pictures of two very well endowed red Twi'lek twins flickered across the holoscreen.

Several women in the room groaned.

"Known for being famous for being famous, these party-girls are the life of _every_ party," Nabrina'vida said before launching into an interview with one of the twins' entourage.

"Groupies would be a more accurate term," Mara said. "I've even run into them a time or two, at the spaceport." She looked accusingly at her husband.

"Did you hurt them very badly, Mara?" Mirax asked, giggling.

Mara grinned, but turned back to Luke when he dared to laugh as well.

"Hey, this time I'm innocent," he said. "They may have been at the spaceport, but I don't know them."

"So there are two Twi'leks in the galaxy that you don't have a … personal connection with?" Mara feigned amazement.

Luke frowned, but couldn't answer as Nabrina'vida listed the men the Twi'lek twins _did_ know.

"Lando?" Wedge looked impressed, until Iella nudged him in the ribs.

"Well, now, you and Luke aren't the only two who knew a Twi'lek or two in the past." He winked. "But I have a much better deal now," he said, pulling Tendra close. She gave him a weak smile, and lay her head on his shoulder.

"Awww," chorused around the room. Lando rolled his eyes, but smiled.

On the holovid, Nabrina'vida grinned hugely, bouncing in anticipation. "We've counted down 97 of our galaxy's sexiest citizens. Are you ready for the final four?" She winked as the program faded into an advertisement.

--I know I am,-- Luke heard in his mind. He turned to his wife.

--Four more and we can get back to our earlier activities?-- He squeezed her thigh.

"You'd better believe it, Farmboy," she said aloud, wetting her lips to get his attention. --Four more placings, and you're mine.--

--

_Again, thank you for all your wonderful comments! We're sorry for the long delay! :)_


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

**--  
**

Everyone was back in the living room for the announcement of the 'final four', as Nabrina'vida had dubbed the last placeholders in the countdown. Luke tried to ignore Hobbie's elbows digging into his ribs as he tried to squeeze next to him on the couch.

"There's nowhere else to sit!" he said as a way of explanation as Mara flung him a deadly look. She was being squashed into the arm of the couch.

"Well if you keep doing that, sitting in general is going to be a problem for you," she growled.

Luke patted her knee, but wasn't sure if he intended it as a calming gesture, or encouragement to follow through on her threat.

"Shhh!" called Lando from across the room, and all attention returned to the holoscreen.

"And lucky number four is..." Nabrina'vida paused for dramatic effect. "...Wedge Antilles!"

All eyes turned towards the Antilles pair, Wedge giving a self-satisfied smile while Iella began to shower him with pecking kisses.

"Some might say he's a surprise choice for number four, but there's nothing surprising about this man's talent or pilot's good looks," Nabrina'vida said as the screen cut to numerous holos of Wedge. "History may have doomed him to simply be Luke Skywalker's wingman whose equipment failed at Yavin…" A holo of Luke and Wedge in their pilots uniforms appeared on the screen. Luke remembered it being taken in the haze of glory immediately following the first Death Star. Gods, had he ever been that young?

"...but Wedge earned his own place in galactic history--and our countdown--with co-founding Rogue Squadron and dedication to the lucrative arts of piloting." The hostess gave a saucy smile to the camera. "My sources say that 'equipment failure' is not one of the man's problems at all," she continued lewdly.

"Too much information, boss," Wes looked disgusted and set his drink down. Wedge, however, gave a 'what can you do' shrug and pulled an inscrutable Iella closer to him.

Nabrina'vida continued to extol Wedge's virtues, interviewing numerous zealous groupies and old flames, growing more excited and bouncy with each one.

"Looks like someone's going to need a cold shower after the show," Leia muttered as the ladies in the room nodded in agreement.

"I wonder if she'd be willing to share..." Wes' eyes seemed to glaze over with the thought of it, until Han smacked him upside the head.

"My children are asleep in the next room," he said roughly, but with a smile on his face. "Please keep my home free of your impure thoughts."

"I have a contact at that station actually, Wes," Lando piped up. "I might be able to get you an introduction."

"Really?" Wes seemed to salivate at the thought.

"She does seem to like pilots," Mirax added encouragingly.

"Always the matchmaker," Corran goaded her lightly.

"Matchmaker, me?" Mirax answered in mock tone. "Not at all – I think offloading Wes onto her is more than enough retribution for her instigating tonight's lewdness."

"Ever the prude," Mara called out teasingly, which made the company laugh. If there was anything Mirax was not, it was a prude.

"You know," Wedge called out over the din, "I was very nice and patient listening to all of your placings, so if you don't mind..." he gestured towards the screen, where Nabrina'vida was discussing, in detail, all of Wedge's known battle scars.

The Twi'lek sashayed in front of a life-sized holo of Wedge and ran one purple finger close to the open collar of the holo's tunic. "If you look closely, you can see the jagged edge of one scar that peaks teasingly out at us from his muscular chest… one can only imagine the heroic battle he must have faced and the pain he must have endured to carry this battle-honed badge of honor…"

Wes gave a loud snort, just as Iella said, "Wait a …"

"What?" Wes asked.

Iella was busy, unbuttoning the top of her husband's tunic.

"Uh--Apparently Iella doesn't care that your children are in the next room, Solo," Wes said, eyes widening.

Iella flushed, but didn't stop her task, even as Wedge backed up in his chair and swatted at her hand. "What are you--"

"Here!" she said, exposing the same scar Nabrina'vida still waxed poetic over from the unit. "I knew it!"

"Knew what?" Wedge muttered, grabbing his shirt and holding it closed.

"That's not a battle scar. You got that when you were putting up Myri's crib…" Iella grabbed the shirt and exposed the faded scar again.

Even Luke couldn't seem hold back his laughter as Wedge flushed and pulled his shirt closed around his neck again. Wedge tried to save face by giving him a challenging look, but Luke met it with one of his own. "Hey, at least I didn't tell anyone about that scar on your chin from falling in that cantina on Bryx…"

Wedge made a mock threatening move, but was held down by Iella in his arms as the laughter grew even louder.

From the holounit, Nabrina'vida had moved on from Wedge's scars to another list of the ladies he was rumored to have dated. "But as we've already seen, only a true disciplinarian could capture the General's heart…" Holos of Wedge and Iella together flashed. "After the parade of females after his heart, it's little wonder his wife must keep a firm hand--in, and out--of the bedroom."

"What?" Iella squeaked. "Where have I gotten this reputation?"

"From the rumors of his "battle scars"?" Wes guessed.

"I don't remember anyone else's going for this long," muttered Hobbie.

But they sat in silence for the rest of the piece with only the occasional comment. Mara began to fidget beside him, and Luke took one of her hands in his own. "Patience is a virtue," he reminded her sweetly, kissing her knuckles.

"Really, do you think anyone would notice if we just slipped out?" Mara asked.

"Yes," Luke answered truthfully. "And besides - " he stopped mid sentence as his attention was drawn away at the sound of Mara's name.

"That's right, rapt viewers," Nabrina'vida said playfully. "Number three on our list is none other than Mrs. Skywalker herself."

"That's my official title is it?" Mara pursed her lips, displeased. Luke wasn't sure whether it was being on the list, or being referred to like that. Probably both, he decided. Luke squeezed her hand and turned his attention back to the holoscreen. He didn't want to miss a moment.

Recent images of Luke and Mara flashed up on the screen, including extended footage of their wedding. "Mara has only recently come into the public eye as the wife of renowned Jedi Master Luke Skywalker," Nabrina'vida said. "We know that she once worked for the Empire and has run a successful trading company with fellow list-ee Talon Karrde, however beyond that we know very little about this elusive woman. It seems that to our viewers, this mysteriousness only adds to her allure."

Three women appeared on the screen, all dressed in black catsuits and what appeared to be red wigs. Nabrina'vida sat across from them, herself donning her own black, skimpy outfit. Laughter bellowed throughout the room, and no one was louder than Han, who slapped his knee and had tears running down his face. He seemed unable to even form a suitable comment, in fact Leia had to slap him hard on the back when he seemed to have trouble breathing. A holo of Mara wearing the original black leather appeared behind the inteviewees.

"My hair is not that colour," Mara grumbled quietly. "And I seriously only wore that outfit once – and it was for a mission! One snap-happy reporters takes my holo and suddenly I'm some leather-obsessed woman on the prowl!"

"Yeah, one of the young recruits has that holo as his screensaver," Wedge added with a smile on his face.

"Wes had that holo as his screensaver!" Hobbie laughed, and Wes threw a couch pillow at him in response.

Mara and Luke both turned to Wes with identical expressions demanding an explanation.

"Uh...that was before I met you, Mara!" Wes began, backing away from the pair. "And can you really blame me? And...and Luke had the holo too!"

Luke shot Wes a dirty look before turning back to Mara, who arched an eyebrow at him. "It's possible that I had a copy at one stage..." he said.

"He had it stuck up in his cockpit!" Wes continued. "And everyone wondered why he clocked up so many flight hours…"

Mara turned to Hobbie and Wedge for confirmation and they both nodded, Hobbie enthusiastically, and Wedge reluctantly. "Traitors," Luke mumbled. Mara patted his knee, and Luke knew it was something she would be teasing him about for months. Luke cleared his throat and turned his attention back to the holoscreen.

"So, ladies," Nabrina'vida asked the trio on the screen, "What do you idolise about Mara Jade Skywalker?"

"Well, for one thing," one of them women answered, "she's married to Luke Skywalker!" The other two nodded enthusiastically.

"You see Luke," Mara whispered quietly to him, "You didn't have to wait so long for me, you could have just dated one of my groupies!" She chuckled quietly, obviously having moved on from annoyance to amusement.

Luke squeezed her hand affectionately. "Pale imitations, my love," he answered. "It was worth the wait."

"Hmmm," Mara answered non-committedly, but Luke could tell she was pleased.

"…she's one of the most successful businesswomen in the galaxy!" one of the interviewees was saying.

"All right, enough already," Han complained. "Tell me, Mara, do you pay these people to extol your virtues?"

"Perhaps they should bring back your Ewok fan to assuage your ego for a bit Solo," Mara bit back laughingly.

But it seemed Nabrina'vida had grown tired of listening to the women herself and cut them off mid-sentence. She was back to her usual position in front of the holoscreen. "For our top placeholders we have extensively researched their backgrounds and former partners for the inside scoop," Nabrina'vida smiled cunningly at the camera. "And while our researchers found it difficult to find any romantic links in Mara's past," she continued, "I did manage to catch up with a man who is certainly no stranger to her."

The image cut to another pre-recorded interview, with Nabrina'vida seated next to an ostentatiously dressed, smiling Lando Calrissian.

The entire gathering turned towards Lando in shock. Karrde for one was not at a loss for words. "You didn't tell us you were actually involved in this...this..."

"Tripe," Shada finished for him.

Lando shrugged. "They're always interviewing me for these things – I never actually pay attention to what they are. I certainly didin't know it was for a program like this. But it's harmless."

"Any excuse to get your face on the holo," Tendra teased, seemingly in better spirits. She kissed him on the cheek playfully.

"That too," Lando agreed.

"I was going to ask just how good your contact at the station was," Wes said, coming over to slap Lando on the shoulder. "But seeing as you actually know Nabrina'vida…" He wriggled his eyebrows lecherously.

"All in good time, my friend," Lando said, distracted by the sight of himself on the HoloNet.

"Now, Lando," Nabrina'vida purred and placed a familiar hand on his knee. The Lando in the living room winced slightly at this as Tendra lost her good humor quickly and her mouth pursed into a straight, tight line. "Tell us about Mara. There was a time when the two of you were very close, was there not?"

"Well, yes," Lando responded smoothly with his trademark winning smile. "But I have always been very close to Mara, that is, as close as she will let someone be!" He chuckled.

"So she was the one in charge of the relationship?" Nabrina'vida questioned.

"I wouldn't put it quite like that," Lando answered. "But I will say that Mara is no ordinary woman, and she certainly took some wooing."

"But you succeeded in the end?" Nabrina'vida pressed him. "There have been reports that the two of you only appeared to be romantically involved to further your joint business ventures?"

"You see, my dear," Lando threw her another winning smile, "we spent quite a bit of time together due to our various business dealings, as you said. But I am afraid that as a gentleman I cannot reveal anything further and have to leave it up to your viewer's imaginations."

Tendra slapped her husband on the arm. "You might be forced to be a gentleman for quite some time," she admonished.

"What?" Lando held up his hands in protest. "That's what the public likes – a bit of mystery! People will be talking about this for ages now!"

"And that's a good thing?" Mara asked. "I only just had people stop asking me about that." She threw Luke a telling look.

"No such thing as bad publicity," Lando said knowingly.

"So, say tomorrow's headline is 'Lando Calrissian's mysterious disappearance, wife and Jedi implicated," Tendra asked him. "Would that still be good?"

"Absolutely!" Lando grinned.

"Shhh!" Luke hushed them, cutting off any further explanation from Lando. "That's my wife up there."

But the images of Mara from her time posing as Lando's girlfriend were replace once more by Nabrina'vida's interview with Lando. The Lando on the screen was squirming uncomfortably as the Twi'lek continued to grow more openly flirtatious with him. She trailed her lekku down his arm, and Tendra snorted at the sight. "Tell me," Nabrina'vida said, "there's something my public wants to know. Is Mara's hair really that shade of red?" She continued to slide her lekku over Lando's arms, as he tried to move back in his chair and out of her reach. "You know… There's no hiding my true color…"

Hoots of laughter rang out in the room, and Lando squirmed to have both Mara and Tendra glaring at him again.

"Can't wait to see you wriggle your way out of this, Old Buddy," Han said, voice still hoarse from his earlier laughing and choking fit.

There was silence for a moment before Wes spoke up, saving Lando from having to respond. "So… Is that her real hair color, boss?" he asked Luke.

"Of course it's her real hair color," Luke answered, looking sideways at Mara to gauge her reaction to the question.

But Mara was looking at Wes as he heaved a put-upon sigh and reached into his pocket, withdrawing a credchip and stretching out in his seat to hand it to Wedge.

Nervous laughter and an uneasy silence followed the action, all eyes in the room turning to Mara in trepidation.

Her eyes narrowed dangerously at Wedge and Wes. "Anything ELSE of mine you two think might not be genuine?"

Han coughed to cover a laugh, and Wes opened his mouth as if to respond, but got a hard nudge in the ribs from Hobbie. Wedge looked away from his wife's disapproving gaze, and held the credchip out in Mara's direction. "Uh…peace offering?" he asked.

Mara didn't say a word, or accept the chip, and over their bond Luke could feel her satisfaction over making so many people squirm.

"Uh…. Look at the holo," Lando said finally, breaking the uneasy silence.

Back on her stage, the Twi'lek hostess still preened for the holocams. "As I said earlier," she drawled, "Our researchers have had some trouble finding any further romantic entanglements of the elusive Mara Jade. But that hasn't seemed to detract from her sexiness, if her position in our countdown is anything to go by. I'm told men can be quite attracted to the look-but-don't-touch act. Not in my experience of course," the Twi'lek sashayed her hips and gave a coy wink. "But anything is possible."

"So, Mara," Wes taunted, apparently trying to see how far he could press, "no romantic entanglements, eh?"

"Maybe they're just all dead, Wes," Mara shot back.

"I'd take that as a warning," Corran called out across the room.

"Yeah, I'd look out if I were you," Wes said to Luke.

"Been there, done that." Luke grinned at Mara.

"Maybe I can just keep a secret," Mara continued, speaking over her husband. "Unlike you spaceport-hopping miscreants."

"Now Mara," Hobbie patted her arm. "Flattery will get you nowhere."

Luke tuned out the banter and turned his attention back to the holos of Mara that were flashing up on the screen. He would certainly have to find a way to congratulate his sexy wife privately when they finally got back to their apartment.

*So something good will come out of this,* he heard Mara say over their bond. *Hopefully I'll be able to reciprocate.*

Luke couldn't help but grin at the thought.

"So that is the fascinating Mara Jade Skywalker," Nabrina'vida was saying on the screen as Mara's holo faded behind her. "We'll be right back with our top two placeholders... Can you guess who they will be?"

--


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

**--  
**

"So that is the fascinating Mara Jade Skywalker," Nabrina'vida was saying on the screen as Mara's holo faded behind her. "We'll be right back with our top two placeholders... Can you guess who they will be?"

As the holovid blared a commercial for Nabrina'vida's newest bodice-ripper and action/adventure holoflick, Wes snorted. "I can place even creds on who the top two will be in this list," he said, pointing. "Those two."

"Well, I've already been on the list," Lando protested, passing by as Wes gestured towards the edge of the couch where Luke and Mara sat, and Leia perched on the arm, Han standing next to her. "But perhaps there was a recount…"

"You've already placed quite a few of your hard earned creds on who you felt would be number one, Janson," Karrde said with a small smile. "But would you care to wager again?"

"Not you, mynock," Wes said to Lando. "I'm not even sure how you made it to forty-five or whatever your number was. And, no, Karrde, I don't need to place another wager. I believe I had it right the first time. Anyway, I was talking about those two… you know…" he lowered his voice dramatically and gestured again. "Luke and Leia Skywalker. The galaxy didn't exist before them, did it?"

"A little jealous?" Hobbie asked.

Wes shook his head, grinning. "Just stating the facts… Well, that and the fact that of everyone in this room--well, besides you, Hobbie, and Tendra--though I'm sure that's just an oversight--we've all been on the list. Number two and one have to be Leia and Luke. Though, of course, I think the lovely Mrs. Solo should have the top spot."

"You do, do you?" Leia asked, leaning out to look past Mara at Wes.

"Well, don't you?" Wes asked, turning the tables on the former princess.

Leia looked sideways at her twin. "Uh…"

Luke smiled. "Don't worry, Leia. I'm not going to be on this list, but even if I were, I think you should be number one, too."

Mara turned towards her husband and echoed Leia. "You do, do you?"

"Uh…" Now Luke echoed his twin. "That's not how I meant--"

Han laughed. "Don't even try, buddy. You'll just make it worse."

"Who do you think will be number one, my sweet?" Lando asked Tendra, who was curled into a ball in her chair, a new bottle of ale held loosely in her grip.

Tendra's eyes flashed up to his. "Why would I know?" she asked. "Who said anything about me knowing who would be number one on this stupid list?"

The room quieted with Tendra's outburst, and Lando looked around uneasily. "I was just…."

Tendra stopped him. "I'm sorry, I think maybe…" she gestured to the ale. "I'm going to excuse myself to the 'fresher for a moment."

As she ran from the room, Lando made to follow. Now it was Han's turn to echo. "Don't even try, buddy. You'll just make it worse."

"You think?" Lando asked, stopping in the doorway his eyes drifting towards the hall where Tendra had fled.

"Just give her a moment," Mirax began sympathetically.

"Women," Wes interrupted, "fight dirty. You'll lose every time, Calrissian."

Five sets of feminine eyes settled on Wes, who noted that once again, he was in peril with the women of the party. "Uh… let's save some time here," he said. "Just how exactly did I wiggle out of trouble the last time?"

The same five sets of eyes rolled in unison. "Actually," Mara said, "we were just going to agree with you, Janson." Leaning over Luke, she punched him hard in the shoulder.

Iella and Mirax laughed at the look on Wes's face, while Shada turned to hide her smile so that only Karrde could see it.

"Ladies," Wes pleaded, "please…"

"Hey, look," Hobbie cut in. "The countdown's back!"

"Saved," Wes muttered under his breath.

On the holo, Nabrina'vida grinned widely at her audience. "Welcome back to the 101 Sexiest Citizens of the New Republic! We're down to our final two places in our countdown, and only the sexiest of the sexiest will make these top spots." She paused dramatically, before sashaying across the stage to stand before a large holoframe. "In our number two spot, we find the complete package… a galactic leader and Master Jedi, a fearless politician and a superb pilot…"

"Hey," Hobbie said, looking towards Luke and Leia, his forehead scrunched together. "That sounds like…. Both of you…"

"That's right," the hostess said breathlessly from the screen, as if in answer to Hobbie's statement. "Coming in at number two on our list of the galaxy's sexiest--you apparently couldn't vote for one without the other—we have your hero and mine—Luke Skywalker and his twin sister, Leia Organa Solo!"

The holoframe lit up to show a picture of a younger Leia and Luke, clutching hands and smiling at the holocams at a state dinner.

"I'll be Kessled," Han said.

"Well, the 'Dira twins did place at number five..." Karrde mused. "Shada, where does this leave our wagers?"

"But… but…" Leia sat starring at the holovid. "The 'Dira twins are like one person. Luke and I don't even look alike!"

Mara looked at Luke's face, red from embarrassment on one side of her, and Leia's face, red from indignation, on the other side. "I'd say you look a lot alike at the moment," she said helpfully. She leaned over and tried to kiss Luke's open mouth. "I told you that you'd be on the list," she whispered, her Force sense bleeding out her glee at the revelation of him as number two on the galactic list.

Luke buried his face in her neck. "I don't want to watch."

"If we're number two, who's number one?" Leia demanded, looking up at Han.

But Han was focused on the holovid. "I remember that outfit fondly," he said with a rakishly upraised brow, looking at a holo of Leia at yet another state dinner, her red dress cinched in tightly around her waist and her hair loosely gathered in the back. "Do you still have that dress?"

Leia cheeks reddened. "I—"

Nabrina'vida appeared next to the holo of Leia. "She is quite attractive," the Twi'lek admitted grudgingly. "But though it is not known which of the Skywalker twins is indeed the oldest, I think it's quite easy to tell if you look at the two of them…" Another holo flashed from the same night, Leia in her red dress being hugged by Luke, his blond hair gleaming and a bright grin on his face. The holo appeared to have been taken later in the evening, and Leia's eyes were half closed from the same holocam light that lit Luke's hair. "Obviously Luke is the younger twin, and probably by quite a few minutes…" Nabrina'vida smirked.

"What!" Leia gasped, jumping up from the arm of the chair. "Did she just insinuate… Luke and I are the EXACT same age!"

Luke pulled his neck from Mara's shoulder, and smiled a bit devilishly at his sibling. "What was that, dear sister? I thought you always claimed to be the older one…."

"Oh, go back to hiding behind your wife," Leia snapped.

"I do not hide behind Mara," Luke protested, sitting up straighter.

Leia turned to him with narrowed eyes.

"Hey," he cautioned, "calm down. People your age shouldn't get too riled…"

An outraged gasp came from Leia, who lunged towards her brother. Luke pushed back against Mara who pushed him back towards his sister. "You're the one living dangerously, Farmboy," she muttered.

"Karrde, are you taking wagers on who'll win in this fight?" Wes asked, as Leia's fist connected with Luke's arm.

"I only deal in wagers I feel are sound, and I would never wager against our former Chief-of-State," Karrde answered.

"Thank you, Talon," Leia said, digging her fist into Luke's shoulder once more. "I appreciate that." She climbed off the sofa and stood next to Han.

"Want to hide behind me now?" Mara asked, as Luke massaged his bruised arm.

"No, I just think Leia shouldn't pick on her little brother," he said, mock-pouting.

Leia rolled her eyes. "Gods, he'll…."

"Okay, children," Han interrupted. "Let's watch the HoloNet…."

"…though they are twins they look nothing alike," Nabrina'vida was saying, comparing pictures of Luke and Leia. "In fact, the only similarity appears to be that both are rather short…"

"Hey!" Luke and Leia responded together.

"…and that both married partners who could be describe as, well, complete scoundrels…"

"Hey!" Han said, and sidled a look to Mara when she didn't respond. He raised a brow. "Jade?"

"Well, in this case I'd have to say our flouncy hostess is correct," she said with a smirk. "And if you and I didn't come along, Han, can you imagine these two?" She jerked a thumb at the twins. "Over-eager, law-abiding… they'd never have any fun…"

"I don't know, Mara," Wedge piped up, from the back, gesturing towards the screen as Mara turned to look at him. "Like I've said before—it looks like Luke did have some fun before he met you…"

And on the screen Nabrina'vida was now slowly going through holo after holo of Luke and women from his past.

"So I see," Mara said in a dangerously low voice.

"…the Master likes Twi'leks who come in lovely colors, though I have to say that I've never seen him with a purple lady," Nabrina'vida said, saucy smile firmly in place. "So I'd like to send out a message to Master Skywalker now…. If… or should I say when things go to Kessel with your marriage… comm me…"

"Turn this drivel off," Mara demanded. "Now." She reached for the remote device, but Wes beat her to it and threw it to Lando, who sat on it. "Great, the one place you knew I wouldn't go…" she said, giving Wes a dirty look.

"Come on, Mara… we've sat through it this long… what's a few more minutes?"

"Torture," Mara muttered, as even more of Luke's ex-flames flashed across the screen. This time, however, it was a montage of past and present interviews with women discussing Luke.

"He was so innocent," a former member of the Rebel Alliance recalled fondly.

"Wahay!" Hobbie clapped Luke on the back. "Forgot about her."

"But he was certainly more than enthusiastic," she continued, as Luke buried his face in his hands.

"He loved to take me flying," another woman said, and it continued on like that for what seemed like an eternity.

Mara fidgeted uncomfortably. "How many of them are there?" she muttered.

"Not jealous, are you Mara?" Han asked innocently.

Mara snorted, but did not reply.

Luke patted her knee. "It's not a competition," he told her softly.

"I know that," she said, and tossed her hair. "I just find all this tripe so boring." She suddenly seemed much more interested, however, when Gaeriel Captison appeared on the screen, looking very uncomfortable.

"I would rather you not ask me questions like that," Gaeriel said, but then looked rather thoughtful. "Luke was... honorable."

The image faded, and the room went silent.

"That's in such poor taste." Leia patted him reassuringly on the shoulder. "I'll write to the station..."

"No, it's fine," Luke gave her a weak smile. "Oh, look, there's some more embarrassing holos," he muttered as the hostess began a running list of his attributes set to a holo montage of him wearing very little.

Luke's face turned an even brighter red as one shot of him lying in his bed with only a sheet covering him flashed on the screen. The image of Gaerial was immediately forgotten as several of the ladies in the room were giving him admiring glances, but Leia snorted as Nabrina'vida began pointing out particular points of interest in the holo. "How did they even get that holo?"

"Uh… I think that's when I realized I needed to get reflective transparisteel," Luke said in a thin voice.

"A lesson we all have to learn the hard way," Wes remarked.

"Indeed." Mara said, with a roll of her eyes, but she took Luke's hand in hers and squeezed it. *Let the galaxy look… but only I can touch…* she sent over their bond.

He silently thanked her for trying to take his mind off the embarrassing sight of his naked chest on the holo and squeezed her hand back tightly. *Can we get out of here yet? There are things I'd much rather be doing...*

Leia's voice cut into their conversation. "All of this is about Luke," she complained.

"Well, sweetheart, no one had a holocam when you were in your steel bikini from Jabba's Palace," Han soothed her.

She opened her mouth to respond, when her holo flashed again. "Finally," she mumbled, instead.

"…the flashier twin, Leia has worn many different hairstyles and political costumes during her life in the public eye. She has worn buns, braids, and twists to create intricate hairstyles copied galaxy-wide. Who can forget the image of a young Senator Organa from Alderaan, her coiled buns sitting astride her head almost as a battle helmet?" Nabrina'vida asked, two wrapped buns of fake hair sitting firmly over her twitching lekku.

"That was the style!" Leia protested, and shot a menacing glare at Wes who dared to laugh.

"Hey, I liked your buns," Han said, pulling his princess close. "They sure caught my eye," he said, swatting her on the backside gently.

"Smooth, Solo," Wes complimented.

Han gave his trademark cocky grin, leaning in to kiss his wife.

"I'm not surprised Leia is on this list… she is a very beautiful woman," a male voice spoke from the HoloNet, and Han stiffened. "Not him again… Please tell me that's not who I think it is…" he groaned, leaning his head against Leia's for support.

"Afraid I can't do that, buddy," Lando said, from his new spot standing in the doorway.

On the screen, Nabrina'vida was busily interviewing Prince Isolder of Hapes, who apparently had no problem discussing his former love interest's attributes.

"Is it true," the Twi'lek hostess began, leaning in close, her ample cleavage once more on display, "that Leia went unwillingly to the alter with Han because you chose another woman over her?"

"Unwilling!" Leia squeaked, her eyes wide.

"Well," the prince said, rubbing his chin, "Leia was to be my wife, but was kidnapped by that ruffian… I mean, by her now-husband, Han Solo. Obviously things worked out in the end, but… I've always felt that Leia and I could have been a very happy and successful couple."

"I'll just bet you do," Han snarled.

"Han," Leia soothed, grasping his hand.

"It's bad enough he beat me in the countdown, but this!"

"Leia has style and grace - that was what first impressed me about her," Isolder continued. "But she is also a cunning and ambitious warrior, while maintaining that beauty. She is tenacious, and certainly the most dazzling woman I have ever known...er..." Isolder seemed to notice something off-screen. "Except, of course, for my lovely wife Tenieniel, who is, obviously, the queen of my heart." He smiled broadly.

"I think there will be trouble on Hapes tonight," Luke observed, remembering all too well Tenieniel's temper.

"Hmph," Han seemed somewhat pleased. "Happy and successful couple there, all right."

"Well, I've never been sorry with the way things worked out," Leia said, pulling him down for a soft, mollifying kiss.

"Not sure the rest of us can say the same, Solo," Mara said slyly.

"Oh, just you wait, Sweetheart," Han said, looking from the HoloNet to Mara and nodding her in its direction.

She scrunched her forehead, but looked at the screen, eyes narrowing as Nabrina'vida sat down in another interview.

"This had better not be one of your Twi'lek honeybombs," Mara said darkly to Luke.

"Honeybombs?" Luke repeated. "Mara, I--"

"Remember, Kid," Han broke in.

Before Luke could answer or even nod, Nabrina'vida's newest guest was revealed.

"Oh," Mara said, sounding somewhat relieved. "It's only Tionne."

"So," Nabrina'vida said to her newest guest, "tell us who you are and how well you know the delectable Master Skywalker."

"I really don't like the way she says 'Master'," Luke said.

"Trust me, we don't either, Boss," Wedge replied.

"…Jedi Historian," Tionne was saying from the HoloNet. "I'm also the Master's archivist and I help to keep his schedule in order."

Nabrina'vida chuckled. "Somewhat of a naughty secretary are we?"

Tionne blushed as she giggled. "Well, we've never been… that… close…"

"Tionne never giggles," Mara all but growled.

"But you'd like to be?" Nabrina'vida pressed the issue.

"Um… You know, I have a ballad about Master Skywalker I could sing for you…" the Jedi historian tried to change the subject nervously, twisting a pale lock of hair around her long finger.

Mara didn't comment but a tick seemed to have developed under her eye. Luke's face was again burning red. "I have a meeting with Tionne in two days," he moaned. "How am I going to…"

"Apparently she'd like you to… eh… reprimand her…" Corran said. "Never knew she had it in her," he whispered to Mirax.

But the interview wasn't over yet. "Avoiding the question, I see…" the hostess winked sassily at her interviewee. "Okay, well… what can you tell us about the Master and his schedule, then?"

Tionne brightened and sat up in her seat. "Let's see… The Master awakens at 0500 and goes for his daily run, followed by calisthenics in the exercise yard before breakfast."

Nabrina'vida nodded knowingly. "Has to keep in top shape for the ladies…or invading Dark Jedi," she simpered. Several holos flashed of Luke, bare-chested and gleaming with sweat as he exercised.

"Oh, for the love of…" Mara finally regained her voice. "Where did they get these holos?"

"Uh… I think that's when I realized I had to use a private gym," Luke answered sheepishly.

Mara and Leia rolled their eyes.

"…schedule differ now that he has a wife?" The interview was still being conducted on the holoscreen.

"Oh," Tionne said, "Mara. Yes, well, when she's on planet, she has given strict orders that the Master should not leave his quarters before 0700..."

Catcalls and sniggers rang out in the room, even as Nabrina'vida giggled merrily on the HoloNet. "I'll just bet she did…"

Now it was Mara's turn to groan, her cheeks pink. "Let me know when it's over," she muttered.

"'Fraid it's only gotten worse, Red," Han said.

Mara looked up to find several shots of her and Luke locked in passionate embraces. "How do they get these holos?" she asked, over the din of catcalls in the room. "That was our honeymoon!"

"Paparazzi-Bots," Leia said faintly, as several holos of herself and Han were shown interspersed with the shots of Luke and Mara. "Chewie's… well, let's just say he's captured and rewired a bot or two."

Chewbacca roared in agreement, crossing his arms behind his head from where he sat on the other side of the room. [Damn nuisances.]

"Thankfully our part seems to be winding down," Leia said, plunking herself back down next to Luke on the arm of the sofa. "But it was all about you. And no one mentioned any of your less than stellar qualities…"

"Leia…" Luke said, voice just short of a whine.

"That's one of them," she said, punching him again in the arm.

He gave a dramatic sigh. "I guess it's just because I'm younger than you…"

But before Leia could comment, Tendra came rushing into the room, loudly calling Lando's name.

"Tendra? My Sweet?" he asked, as all eyes in the room turned to the couple.

Tendra was taking deep breaths, as she stopped in front of her husband. "I have something to tell you," she said, taking a long draw from the bottle in her hand as if gaining liquid courage before imparting a secret.

"What is it?" Lando asked, dark eyes filled with concern. "Do you want to talk out in the hall?"

"No!" she cried, spreading her arms wide. "They might as well all know… I love you, Lando!"

"Not quite a revelation," Wes observed.

Tendra continued on as if she hadn't heard. "I love you, Lando, but I voted on this stupid, childish countdown…. And I voted for… I voted for Luke!" Secret out, she broke into messy, loud sobs.

The silence of the room was broken only by Nabrina'vida from the HoloNet. "That was the sinfully sexy Luke Skywalker and his sister, Leia Organa Solo. Who could have possibly beaten them out as the sexiest in the galaxy? Your number one pick will be revealed next!"

--


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

Awkward silence met Tendra's announcement, with Luke blushing red once more. Lando's mouth hung slightly open as if he couldn't believe what he had just heard.

But Tendra's drunken sobs continued and she couldn't answer, until Leia handed her a tissue and patted her shoulder comfortingly. "Maybe it would be best-" she started, but Lando cut her off.

"You voted for Luke?" he asked quietly.

"It's not what you think!" Tendra burst out. "I just… I was shopping and this woman asked me to be a part of the survey… I'd had a crush on Luke when I was younger and his name just… popped out! Besides, I didn't think you'd need my vote… you always have women lusting after you…"

"You're making it worse," Wes mumbled under his breath, wincing as Tendra turned steely eyes to him.

Lando said nothing, seemingly still absorbing the news that his wife had voted for another man as the galaxy's sexiest.

Tendra broke into the tension once more. "Lando, really. You have absolutely nothing to worry about. Yes, I once thought Luke was hot, but then I got to know him!"

Some of the nervous tension was broken as Wes let out a loud guffaw and even Han seemed to be having a hard time not laughing. Next to Mara, Luke's face burned even brighter. Realizing how she must have sounded, Tendra turned to him. "Luke, I'm sorry. It's not that you're unattractive…. Because you're obviously very attractive…"

Lando finally spoke. "Okay, I agree with Wes. You're making it worse, Tendra."

"Look, it's just a dumb program on the HoloNet," Iella said from her seat in the back. "I think maybe it's time for us to turn it off and…"

"Welcome back to the 101 Sexiest Citizens of the NR!" Nabrina'vida crowed from the HoloNet.

"Too late," Hobbie remarked.

"We've counted down the 100 sexiest citizens of our fair Republic, and it's time to reveal your number one choice… The Sexiest of the Sexiest. But first, let's look back once more at our Top 100…"

"Thankfully this is almost over…" Luke whispered to Mara as the previous members of the list cycled through once more. "Though I think we could sneak out now and no one would notice…" Tendra and Lando were involved in a quiet conversation on their corner of the sofa and everyone else seemed to be paying them more attention than the HoloNet.

"…make it up to me when we get home," Lando said, his voice once again teasing and full of love for his wife.

"And how is that different from any other night?" Tendra teased voice a bit wobbly but filled with relief.

"Okay, more than we need to know," Han boomed out, slapping Lando on the back. "Now, look," he gestured to the HoloNet. "We're at the end of this torture fest."

Nabrina'vida was grinning widely at her audience, bouncing on her feet in anticipation. "So here we are… at number 1. The sexiest citizen of our Republic. He's the complete package… mysterious and aloof, strong and confident… the only one who could have clawed his way to the number one spot on our countdown…. You voted NR and your pick for Sexiest Citizen is….."

It seemed that everyone was holding their breath, Luke noted, looking around.

"…. BOBA FETT!"

"What?" Han practically dropped his bottle of ale and the room broke into a loud mess of chaos and disbelief.

"That Sarlaac smelling piece of vomit…"

"Fett?"

"Rigged voting from Mando fanboys….!"

The HoloNet played on, oblivious to the disturbance in the Solo household. Nabrina'vida wasn't done yet. "…the armor is part of his sex appeal, sure, but many have wondered just what is underneath…"

"That's it!" Luke said, standing and waving his hand towards the HoloNet unit, turning it off with the Force. "I can't take it anymore!"

The room broke into spontaneous applause, until Leia shushed everyone. "The kids are sleeping!"

Luke turned to Mara. "I'm sorry for the unnecessary use of the Force but…"

"Farmboy," she said, taking his hand and squeezing, "I'd say that was very necessary." She winked at him and allowed him to pull her up to stand with him. "Well, guys, I guess we're out of here."

Leia laughed. "I'm sure you have more interesting things to be doing."

"I'd say we all do," Han teased, slapping Luke on the back. "But first, how about using some of those Force powers to help pick up all these empty bottles of ale?"

"Don't listen to him," Leia said. "The party was for you. Get out of here."

"Bye Big Sis," Luke said, kissing her check and barely avoiding a swat. "Thanks for the party."

Mara paused at the door, and looked back at their friends with her familiar half smirk. "Thanks for the party guys…. But I think next year a firing squad might be somewhat less painful."

The door closed behind her and Luke to the sound of their friends laughing, apparently in full agreement.

xx

"Don't push me!" Jaina muttered as Jacen pushed her in front of him and Anakin.

"Hey, hey, what are you kids into?" Leia asked, looking at them suspiciously.

"Uh… nothing!" Jaina said. "Just… Well, could we use the comm.?"

"Who are you going to call?"

"We need to collect what's owed to us…" Jacen muttered before Jaina elbowed him in the ribs.

"Uncle Luke?" Anakin piped up over his brother, sounding more like he was asking a question than supplying an answer.

Leia looked at them, sizing them up. "You might wake him and Aunt Mara up," she said finally, but then grinned. "Sure, go ahead."

"Thanks!" the kids chorused and took off to towards the comm., relieved when their mother went into the kitchen to confer with Threepio.

They tapped in the numbers quickly and smiled widely when Talon Karrde answered their call.

"I figured I would hear from you three bright and early," he said.

"We just wanted to assure our winnings," Jaina said, the spokeswoman for the group.

"Yes, all three of you correctly bet on Boba Fett for the win…. I just can't help but wonder how you knew."

All three of the children flashed a smile that was far too much like their father's for Karrde's comfort. "Never mind," he said. "I'll have the credits to you by the end of the day."

"Good doing business with you," Jaina said, turning off the comm.. She turned to her brothers. "Do you think we should have told him how we knew?"

"That the show was a rerun? No way! I have plans for those credits. There's this great copper headed tree-lizard that I've had my eye on…"

"Hey, I wanted to buy spare parts for the Falcon!" Jaina cried, challenging her twin.

"The creds are going to be split three ways, right?" Anakin said, and realizing he wasn't heard over his older siblings he repeated himself. "RIGHT?"

xx

Talon Karrde sat at the comm. station for a moment, a small smirk playing at his lips. A slight footfall behind him bade him turn in his seat to accept the cup of caf Shada offered him.

"Our little winners, I take it?" Shada asked.

"Yes," Karrde said, giving her a shrewd look. "I have inkling, but do you know how they knew?"

Shada wrapped her robe tighter around her as she leaned against the comm. station. "We never did check the HoloNet listings," she said.

Karrde nodded, and then took a sip of his caf before placing it on the counter. "A rerun," he said, but he was smiling. "Those little brats."

xx

"Good morning," Mara murmured, running her foot up Luke's naked leg.

"A very good morning," Luke agreed, kissing her neck. "Happy anniversary, love."

"It's not our anniversary anymore," she corrected. "It's the morning after. Now we're not newlyweds, we're just an old married couple."

"But I like the sound of that," Luke said.

"You would," Mara teased. "This is how we should have spent last night… Alone, just you and me."

"Come on, you didn't have the least bit of fun hanging out with our friends?"

Mara was silent for a moment. "If pressed I might admit that I did… but only to you. But I certainly had more fun once we got back home," she said with a smirk, turning in his arms and propping herself up to look down at him.

"Me too." He grinned up at her. "It was quite a party, though… That countdown was interesting…"

"More like a waste of time," Mara said.

Luke squashed a smile. "Come on, you're not even pleased with your ranking? Number 3 out of the entire Galaxy? Very well deserved, I must say," he said, running a hand up her back, tickling lightly.

Mara rolled her eyes. "I thought that with all your Jedi Fangirls you'd be number 1."

"Well, thank you, my love. But I guess I just don't have what Fett has," he said with a grin.

"Oh, and what's that?" Mara asked.

"It's the allure of the Mandalorian Armor, Mara. No other man can compete with it."

xx

Tendra Calrissian snuggled closer to her husband, not quite wanting to get out of bed just yet.

"Happy, my sweet?" Landon asked her gently, twining a lock of her hair through his fingers.

"Very," Tendra smiled. "But I'm rather surprised that you haven't probed me further..." she paused.

"Verbally, I mean," she added with a smirk,

Lando chuckled for a moment before answering. "Why you voted for Luke?" he asked, and smiled. "Well, my dear, I don't blame you," he continued. "You're not the first woman to be swayed by the Skywalker charm. In fact, it was the reason I brought Luke with me when we met."

"You know, I'd always had a bit of a girlhood crush on Luke," she admitted, not daring to look up. "But then when I saw you I forgot all about it. I never gave it a thought again until I was asked to vote for the show. It was some time ago, and I thought it was funny."

Lando chuckled and pulled her closer. "And of course, you thought that your dashing husband wouldn't need your vote."

Tendra looked up and gave him a kiss. "Of course." She chuckled. "I love you, Lando."

Lando grinned. "Naturally." He leaned down for another kiss but was interrupted by the intrusive ring of the comm. "Of course," he muttered as he rolled over to answer it. Any other woman would have told him to ignore it and he would have had to pull the 'but it's business' card. But not Tendra, he thought with happiness as he clicked on the comm. unit. If he didn't answer it, than she would – and then chide him for it. She was as business-minded as any woman he had ever met. He liked that.

xx

"Hey, Corran, look at this." Mirax called her husband over to where she sat studying the morning news on the HoloNet. It was a tiny article, one most would miss if they were not looking for it, or, like her, they scanned every inch of the press every morning just in case there was something interesting buried under all the galactic news, political slander and celebrity gossip.

"Apology," Corran read from the small article over Mirax's shoulder. "The E-tainment Corporation would like to apologise regarding the HoloNet programme 101 Sexiest Citizens of the New Republic that ran last night. A clerical error in tabulating the votes incorrectly placed Han Solo at number ten. We would like to inform the public that General Solo's correct placing is number nine, and Prince Isolder of Hapes is placed at number ten."

"Unfortunately the mistake was not rectified for last night's repeat broadcast," Mirax finished for him. She looked up at her husband. "Perhaps we should let Han know? He did seem to have a bit of a complex about it."

Corran gave her a sly smile. "There's a time and a place for everything, Mirax," he replied. "I think we should save this for the right moment."

Mirax grinned. "Maybe I'll just tell Leia..." she mused to herself.

xx

Tycho and Winter Celchu sat in the kitchen of their modest apartment, drinking stim-free tea and chatting about floral arrangements. Or at least, Winter was nattering on and Tycho was listening politely.

"I wonder if anything interesting happened after we left last night?" Tycho asked eventually, when the subject of Dantooine roses had been exhausted.

A small crease formed between Winter's eyes. "Probably not," she said and shrugged.

Tycho mirrored her shrug, cast the thought from his mind and went back to his tea.

xx

"What time do you think this is?" Wedge ran a tired hand over his eyes as he spoke into the comm.

"Oh, come on, Wedge-cakes, I knew you were up," Wes' smooth voice came through the speakers, "what with your rugrats and all."

Wedge thought back darkly to when his girls had woken him from his sleep early that morning with demands for breakfast and amusement and introduced him to his hangover.

"You don't have to be so smug about it," he muttered. "But why are you comm-ing me? Why are you even up?" It was still relatively early in the morning, as least it would seem that way to people who had perhaps indulged a bit too much the night before.

Wes laughed, and Wedge had a feeling he'd been waiting to be asked that question. "Boss, I never went to sleep!"

From across the table, Iella gave him a disgusted look.

"I'm hanging up, Wes," Wedge warned him. He moved to switch off the comm. when through the speaker came sounds of slight scuffling, like someone grabbing the receiver from Wes.

"Hello, number 4," a suspiciously familiar voice purred through the comm.

Iella's eyes suddenly became very wide.

"Er...hello...Nabrina'vida," Wedge managed to stutter, utterly shocked. "So I guess Lando introduced you two after all."

"That's right," the Twi'lek replied, and laughed.

There was another scuffling sound as Wes grabbed the comm. back. "Nab and I had a nice friendly chat about the travesty of my placing," Wes told them.

"Very friendly, I'm sure," Iella cut in, loud enough for the comm. to pick it up. But a smile was forming at the corners of her mouth.

"I must say," the Twi'lek said, "I was eventually...persuaded to see things from his point of view."

"Well, I'm happy for you Wes," Wedge said tiredly. "But I'm sure you have other people to gloat over...I mean call."

"Ha ha," Wes answered, but didn't deny it. "In any case," he continued, "Nab and I plan to be busy for the rest of the day."

"Nab?" Iella mouthed to him and raised her eyebrows.

Wedge shook his head and smiled. "Bye Wes," he said over the comm. "Bye Nab," he added belatedly, just before he switched off the comm.

"That was surreal," Iella commented dryly.

"And we'll never hear the end of it," Wedge added. "And you never know, Nab might be attending our next party as Wes' other half."

Iella choked on her caf and laughed. "Gods help us all."

The comm. rang again and Wedge answered it with trepidation. "Yes?"

"Wedge!" a voice winged over the speakers.

"What is it Hobbie?" Wedge was beginning to wish he'd unplugged the comm.

"Have you heard from Wes? It's so unfair!"

Wedge sighed. "Isn't it just." He made a face at Iella. "Maybe you should take it up with Lando."

"I already have," Hobbie pouted. "It's just..."

Wedge half-tuned out, letting Hobbie talk and imputing 'I see' 'I know' and 'Of course,' at the correct intervals. Iella got up from the table and gave him a kiss on the temple.

"More caf?" she asked softly.

"Please," he answered. "I think I need it."

xx

Han Solo eyed his three children suspiciously. They were huddled in a corner, seated in a circle which seemed unusually like a conference; or whatever kids did instead of having conferences.

"What are they up to?" he asked his wife, who was pouring over briefings on her datapad.

Leia glanced up and studied her children, the shrugged and went back to her work. "I don't know," she answered. "They wanted to use to comm. earlier."

"To call who?" Han asked, his gaze still on the kids, who all seemed rather intense and conversing with each other rapidly.

Leia shrugged. "Something about 'collecting what was owed to them.' They wouldn't say anything more."

"And you didn't interrogate them?" Han was confused – it was unlike Leia to be so passive when it came to the schemes of the children.

"Who says I just don't want them to think they're getting away with it?" she looked up, her eyes twinkling mischievously. "Whatever it is."

Han gave her a crooked grin – that sounded more like his wife. "Collecting what is owed," he mused to himself. "Wonder what that could be."

"Of course, if it is anything monetary, it will have to be confiscated from them," Leia added, her eyes back on her datapad.

Han nodded, understanding. "So it is probably best not to punish them prematurely," he added, "but to...wait and see what they're up to."

"My thoughts exactly." Leia took a sip of caf and continued to study her datapad. Han sighed and got up to make himself another caf, sneaking in a choc-shot when he thought Leia wasn't looking.

"You know," he said as he sat down again. "That countdown thing. I think I really placed higher than Isolder. He probably bought his votes."

"Yeah," Leia agreed. "I think I really placed higher than Luke. It's just illogical to get the exact same vote count among billions."

"Yeah."

It was all the affirmation either of them needed.

xx

An alluring purple Twi'lek stands in front of her stage lights. "You've counted down the Sexiest Pilots and Sexiest Citizens with us. You've watched as we've counted down the Most Embarrassing Celebrity Moments…. But tune in now as we conduct our naughtiest countdown yet… 101 Most Shocking Celebrity Secrets…"

"Cut for the sound bite-" the Twi'lek's director shouts.

"Darth Vader is their father? WHO saw that one coming?"

"And again…. Action!"

Nabrina'vida gives a wide, engaging grin to her audience. "Tonight on E-Tainment. Don't miss it!"

xx

a/n: And there you have it-finally, the end! Thank you for all your support and kind comments. We hope you had as much fun reading this as we had writing it!


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